1 00:01:48,757 --> 00:01:51,225 Do you consider the book to be autobiographical? 2 00:01:52,803 --> 00:01:54,760 Well, I mean... 3 00:01:55,014 --> 00:01:57,733 ... isn't everything autobiographical? 4 00:01:58,017 --> 00:02:02,294 I mean, we all see the world through our own tiny keyhole, right? 5 00:02:02,688 --> 00:02:04,519 I mean, I always think of Thomas Wolfe. 6 00:02:04,815 --> 00:02:07,933 Have you ever seen that little one-page "Note to Reader"... 7 00:02:08,236 --> 00:02:10,272 ... in the front of Look Homeward, Angel? 8 00:02:11,154 --> 00:02:15,864 Anyway, he says that we are the sum of all the moments of our lives... 9 00:02:16,242 --> 00:02:19,872 ... and anybody who sits down to write will use the clay of their own life... 10 00:02:20,205 --> 00:02:21,684 ... that you can't avoid that. 11 00:02:21,915 --> 00:02:26,624 So when I look at my own life, I have to admit, right, that I... 12 00:02:27,128 --> 00:02:31,441 I've never been around a bunch of guns or violence, you know, not really. 13 00:02:31,842 --> 00:02:35,596 No political intrigue or a helicopter crash, right? 14 00:02:36,388 --> 00:02:40,302 But my life, from my own point of view, has been full of drama, right? 15 00:02:41,102 --> 00:02:43,457 And so I thought, if I could write a book... 16 00:02:43,771 --> 00:02:48,002 ... that could capture what it's like to really meet somebody... 17 00:02:48,400 --> 00:02:50,961 One of the most exciting things that's happened to me... 18 00:02:51,237 --> 00:02:53,432 ... is to meet somebody, make that connection. 19 00:02:53,740 --> 00:02:57,617 And if I could make that valuable, you know, to capture that... 20 00:02:58,451 --> 00:03:01,603 ... that would be the attempt, or... 21 00:03:02,289 --> 00:03:04,678 Did I answer your question? 22 00:03:05,375 --> 00:03:07,683 I'll try to be more specific. 23 00:03:08,252 --> 00:03:10,846 Was there ever a French young woman on a train you met... 24 00:03:11,130 --> 00:03:13,361 ... and spent an evening with? 25 00:03:17,346 --> 00:03:20,144 See, to me, that... I mean... 26 00:03:20,432 --> 00:03:23,742 ... that's not important, you know? - So that's a yes? 27 00:03:24,812 --> 00:03:28,646 All right, since I'm in France and this is the last stop of my book tour, yes. 28 00:03:29,608 --> 00:03:31,360 Thank you. 29 00:03:31,610 --> 00:03:34,886 Mr. Wallace, the book ends on an ambiguous note. 30 00:03:35,198 --> 00:03:36,472 We don't know. 31 00:03:36,741 --> 00:03:39,209 Do you think they get back together in six months... 32 00:03:39,577 --> 00:03:42,806 ... like they promise each other? 33 00:03:43,579 --> 00:03:45,410 Like they promised? 34 00:03:47,084 --> 00:03:49,678 I think how you answer that, you know, is... 35 00:03:50,629 --> 00:03:53,779 It's a good test, right, if you're a romantic or a cynic. 36 00:03:54,131 --> 00:03:57,966 Right? I mean, you think they get back together, right? 37 00:03:58,303 --> 00:03:59,782 - You don't, for sure. - No. 38 00:04:00,013 --> 00:04:01,924 And you hope they do, but you're not sure. 39 00:04:02,224 --> 00:04:05,739 - That's why you're asking the question. - Do you think they get back together? 40 00:04:06,103 --> 00:04:08,139 I mean, did you in real life? 41 00:04:09,691 --> 00:04:11,443 Did I in real...? 42 00:04:11,901 --> 00:04:14,368 Look, in the words of my grandfather, okay: 43 00:04:14,653 --> 00:04:17,645 "To answer that would take the piss out of the whole thing. " 44 00:04:18,657 --> 00:04:22,014 We just have the time for one last question. 45 00:04:22,370 --> 00:04:24,008 What is your next book? 46 00:04:26,664 --> 00:04:29,053 I don't know, man. I don't know. 47 00:04:29,417 --> 00:04:32,728 I've been... I've been thinking about this... 48 00:04:33,046 --> 00:04:35,640 Well, I always kind of wanted to write a book... 49 00:04:35,924 --> 00:04:39,438 ... that all took place within the space of a pop song. 50 00:04:39,802 --> 00:04:42,795 Like three or four minutes long, the whole thing. 51 00:04:43,140 --> 00:04:46,496 The story, the idea, is that there's this guy, right... 52 00:04:46,852 --> 00:04:49,446 ... and he's totally depressed. 53 00:04:49,771 --> 00:04:53,765 His great dream was to be a lover, an adventurer, you know... 54 00:04:54,110 --> 00:04:56,749 ... riding motorcycles through South America. 55 00:04:57,071 --> 00:04:59,709 And instead he's sitting at a marble table eating lobster. 56 00:04:59,990 --> 00:05:02,948 He's got a good job and a beautiful wife, right, but that... 57 00:05:03,243 --> 00:05:06,475 Everything that he needs. But that doesn't matter... 58 00:05:06,831 --> 00:05:09,664 ... because what he wants is to fight for meaning. 59 00:05:10,043 --> 00:05:12,191 You know? Happiness is in the doing, right? 60 00:05:12,502 --> 00:05:14,697 Not in the getting what you want. 61 00:05:15,004 --> 00:05:18,361 So he's sitting there, and just that second... 62 00:05:18,675 --> 00:05:22,747 ... his little 5-year-old daughter hops up on the table. 63 00:05:23,095 --> 00:05:26,246 And he knows that she should get down, because she could get hurt. 64 00:05:26,599 --> 00:05:31,116 But she's dancing to this pop song in a summer dress. 65 00:05:31,939 --> 00:05:33,850 And he looks down... 66 00:05:34,149 --> 00:05:36,538 ... and all of a sudden, he's 16. 67 00:05:37,486 --> 00:05:42,720 And his high-school sweetheart is dropping him off at home. 68 00:05:43,117 --> 00:05:46,552 And they just lost their virginity, and she loves him... 69 00:05:46,870 --> 00:05:50,659 ... and the same song is playing on the car radio. 70 00:05:51,084 --> 00:05:53,917 And she climbs up and starts dancing on the roof of the car. 71 00:05:54,254 --> 00:05:55,731 And now he's worried about her. 72 00:05:55,962 --> 00:06:00,080 And she's beautiful, with a facial expression just like his daughter's. 73 00:06:00,592 --> 00:06:02,662 In fact, maybe that's why he even likes her. 74 00:06:02,970 --> 00:06:05,768 You see, he knows he's not remembering this dance... 75 00:06:06,098 --> 00:06:09,646 ... he's there. He's there, in both moments, simultaneously. 76 00:06:10,017 --> 00:06:13,294 And just for an instant, all his life is just folding in on itself. 77 00:06:13,647 --> 00:06:16,241 And it's obvious to him that time is a lie. 78 00:06:18,652 --> 00:06:21,007 That it's all happening all the time... 79 00:06:21,280 --> 00:06:24,717 ... and inside every moment is another moment... 80 00:06:25,118 --> 00:06:26,870 ... all happening simultaneously. 81 00:06:27,162 --> 00:06:30,119 Anyway, that's kind of the idea. Anyway. 82 00:06:31,582 --> 00:06:33,857 Our author has to be going to the airport soon... 83 00:06:34,168 --> 00:06:36,967 ... so thank you all very much for coming over this afternoon. 84 00:06:37,297 --> 00:06:40,412 And a special thanks to Mr. Wallace for being with us. 85 00:06:40,756 --> 00:06:42,109 Thank you. Thank you. 86 00:06:42,341 --> 00:06:44,935 We hope to see you here again with your next book. 87 00:06:51,642 --> 00:06:54,873 Thank you all. How much longer before I have to go to the airport? 88 00:06:55,188 --> 00:06:56,747 Oh, you should leave at 7:30... 89 00:06:57,065 --> 00:06:59,499 - Seven-thirty at the very latest. - Okay. 90 00:07:04,490 --> 00:07:07,687 - Hi. - Hello. 91 00:07:10,455 --> 00:07:13,049 - How are you? - Good, and you? 92 00:07:14,958 --> 00:07:17,631 I'm good, yeah, I'm great. I'm... 93 00:07:18,545 --> 00:07:20,776 Do you wanna, maybe, get a cup of coffee? 94 00:07:21,633 --> 00:07:23,988 Didn't he just say you have a plane to catch? 95 00:07:25,134 --> 00:07:27,932 Yeah. But, I mean, I have a little time. 96 00:07:28,429 --> 00:07:31,581 - Okay. - Yeah? All right, well, let me... 97 00:07:31,934 --> 00:07:33,925 I'll meet you outside. Okay. 98 00:07:35,770 --> 00:07:38,045 Excuse me. I'm just gonna go get a cup of coffee. 99 00:07:38,356 --> 00:07:40,506 - I'll be back at 7:15. - Did you sign all these? 100 00:07:40,775 --> 00:07:43,290 - Yeah, I sure did. - Get your driver Philippe's card... 101 00:07:43,612 --> 00:07:46,001 ... so you can call his cell if you're running late. 102 00:07:46,323 --> 00:07:48,791 We'll put your bags in the car so you're not late. 103 00:07:49,117 --> 00:07:51,551 - All right, thanks for everything. - Thank you. 104 00:07:53,998 --> 00:07:55,875 Which one's Philippe? 105 00:08:13,891 --> 00:08:17,089 - I can't believe you're here. - I live here in Paris. 106 00:08:18,647 --> 00:08:21,843 Are you sure you don't have to stay? You're not supposed to talk more? 107 00:08:22,191 --> 00:08:24,147 They're sick of me. I spent the night here. 108 00:08:24,443 --> 00:08:27,641 - You did? - Yeah, they got a loft upstairs. 109 00:08:28,157 --> 00:08:30,432 - How are you? This is so weird. - I'm fine. 110 00:08:30,742 --> 00:08:34,291 - It's good to see you. - It's good to see you. 111 00:08:36,832 --> 00:08:39,142 - So you want to go to a cafe? - Yeah. 112 00:08:39,460 --> 00:08:41,735 Okay. There's one a little further that I like. 113 00:08:42,005 --> 00:08:45,713 I thought I was gonna totally lose it in there when I first saw you. 114 00:08:46,091 --> 00:08:47,763 How did you know I was gonna be here? 115 00:08:48,051 --> 00:08:52,250 It's my favorite bookstore in Paris. You can sit down for hours and read. 116 00:08:52,599 --> 00:08:54,508 I love it. There's fleas, but, you know... 117 00:08:54,765 --> 00:08:57,040 I know. I think a cat slept on my head last night. 118 00:08:57,310 --> 00:08:59,825 I saw your picture on the calendar about a month ago... 119 00:09:00,105 --> 00:09:01,902 ... and that you were going to be here. 120 00:09:02,399 --> 00:09:05,197 It's funny, because I read an article on your book... 121 00:09:05,485 --> 00:09:09,319 ... and it sounded vaguely familiar. - Vaguely? Yeah. 122 00:09:09,864 --> 00:09:13,540 But I didn't put it all together until I saw your photo. So... 123 00:09:13,869 --> 00:09:15,939 Did you have a chance to read it? 124 00:09:16,246 --> 00:09:17,599 Yes, I... 125 00:09:17,831 --> 00:09:20,186 I was really, really surprised, as you can imagine. 126 00:09:20,501 --> 00:09:23,016 I mean, I had to read it twice, actually. 127 00:09:23,338 --> 00:09:25,294 - Yeah? - Yeah. 128 00:09:26,799 --> 00:09:29,312 No, I liked it. It's very romantic. 129 00:09:29,593 --> 00:09:32,153 I usually don't like that, but it's really well-written. 130 00:09:32,471 --> 00:09:35,350 - It's well-written. Congratulations. - All right. Thank you. 131 00:09:35,892 --> 00:09:37,689 - Wait. - What? 132 00:09:37,977 --> 00:09:41,763 Before we go anywhere, I have to ask you... 133 00:09:42,355 --> 00:09:43,868 Sure. What? 134 00:09:44,106 --> 00:09:46,985 Did you show up in Vienna that December? 135 00:09:48,946 --> 00:09:53,143 - Did you? - No, I couldn't. But did you? 136 00:09:53,491 --> 00:09:56,723 - I need to know. It's important to me. - Why, if you didn't? 137 00:09:57,246 --> 00:09:59,157 Well, did you? 138 00:09:59,414 --> 00:10:00,847 No. 139 00:10:02,543 --> 00:10:03,976 Thank God you didn't. 140 00:10:04,253 --> 00:10:05,971 - Oh, my God. - Thank God you didn't. 141 00:10:06,255 --> 00:10:09,612 Thank God I didn't and you didn't. If one of us had showed up alone... 142 00:10:09,926 --> 00:10:12,235 ... that would have sucked. - I was so concerned. 143 00:10:12,511 --> 00:10:16,220 I felt horrible about not being there, but I couldn't. My grandma died... 144 00:10:16,598 --> 00:10:18,749 ... and she was buried that day, December 16th. 145 00:10:19,060 --> 00:10:21,528 - The one in Budapest? - Yes. You remember that? 146 00:10:21,855 --> 00:10:24,526 - I remember everything. - Of course, it was in your book. 147 00:10:24,814 --> 00:10:27,965 But anyway, I was about to fly to Vienna, you know... 148 00:10:28,317 --> 00:10:32,197 ... and we heard the news about her, and of course I had to go to the funeral. 149 00:10:32,531 --> 00:10:34,203 Yeah, I'm sorry to hear that. 150 00:10:34,449 --> 00:10:38,043 I know. But you weren't there anyway. 151 00:10:38,411 --> 00:10:40,801 Wait. Why weren't you there? 152 00:10:41,123 --> 00:10:44,320 I would have been there if I could have. I made plans... 153 00:10:44,668 --> 00:10:46,784 You better have a good reason. 154 00:10:47,087 --> 00:10:48,361 What? 155 00:10:50,507 --> 00:10:51,907 Oh, no. 156 00:10:52,635 --> 00:10:54,591 No, you were there, weren't you? 157 00:10:54,888 --> 00:10:57,447 Oh, no, that's terrible ! 158 00:10:57,764 --> 00:10:59,402 I'm laughing, but I don't mean it. 159 00:10:59,641 --> 00:11:01,438 Did you hate me? You must've hated me. 160 00:11:01,685 --> 00:11:03,836 - Have you been hating me all this time? - No. 161 00:11:04,105 --> 00:11:05,379 - Yes, you have. - No. 162 00:11:05,648 --> 00:11:07,400 But you can't hate me now, right? 163 00:11:07,692 --> 00:11:10,682 - I mean, my grandma... - I don't hate you. It's no big deal. 164 00:11:11,027 --> 00:11:13,461 I flew all the way over there, you blew the thing off. 165 00:11:13,779 --> 00:11:16,738 My life's been a big nosedive since, but it's not a problem. 166 00:11:17,075 --> 00:11:19,793 - No, I'm kidding. - Don't say that. I can't believe it. 167 00:11:20,119 --> 00:11:22,474 You must have been so angry with me. I'm so sorry. 168 00:11:22,747 --> 00:11:25,182 I wanted to be there, more than anything in the world. 169 00:11:25,459 --> 00:11:28,098 - Honestly, I swear... - You can't be angry, my grandmother... 170 00:11:28,378 --> 00:11:31,893 I know. I honestly thought that something like that might have happened. 171 00:11:32,216 --> 00:11:34,207 I was definitely bummed, but... 172 00:11:34,468 --> 00:11:38,018 Mostly I was mad we hadn't exchanged any phone numbers or any information. 173 00:11:38,348 --> 00:11:40,259 That was so stupid. No way to get in touch. 174 00:11:40,517 --> 00:11:42,746 - Nothing to go on. - I didn't know your last name. 175 00:11:43,018 --> 00:11:46,090 Remember, we were both afraid if we started writing and calling... 176 00:11:46,396 --> 00:11:49,787 ... that it would slowly fade out. - It definitely wasn't a slow fade. 177 00:11:50,109 --> 00:11:51,303 No, it sure wasn't. 178 00:11:51,528 --> 00:11:53,278 We wanted to pick up where we left off. 179 00:11:53,528 --> 00:11:56,759 Which would have been fine if it had worked. Oh, well. 180 00:11:58,241 --> 00:11:59,721 So... 181 00:12:00,369 --> 00:12:03,441 - How long were you in Vienna, then? - Just a couple days. 182 00:12:05,122 --> 00:12:07,192 Did you meet another girl? 183 00:12:07,500 --> 00:12:09,969 Yeah, her name was Gretchen and she was amazing. 184 00:12:10,295 --> 00:12:12,889 The book's really a composite of the two of you. 185 00:12:13,215 --> 00:12:16,844 No, I'm kidding. You wouldn't believe... I even went back to the train station. 186 00:12:17,219 --> 00:12:21,132 I put up signs of my number in the hotel in case you'd been delayed. 187 00:12:21,474 --> 00:12:23,988 - I was a total dork. - Let's go this way. Did you get any calls? 188 00:12:24,477 --> 00:12:27,434 Just a couple hookers looking for a gig. 189 00:12:27,771 --> 00:12:30,205 No, it was awful, I mean, what do you want me to say? 190 00:12:30,482 --> 00:12:31,835 It's so sad. I'm so sorry. 191 00:12:32,109 --> 00:12:35,068 I walked around for a couple days. Eventually, I flew home. 192 00:12:35,405 --> 00:12:37,555 I owed my dad 2000 bucks... 193 00:12:37,866 --> 00:12:39,775 ... who had warned me about French chicks. 194 00:12:40,074 --> 00:12:41,871 What did he tell you about French women? 195 00:12:42,160 --> 00:12:44,152 Nothing. He's never met any French women. 196 00:12:44,454 --> 00:12:46,604 He's never been east of the Mississippi. 197 00:12:46,874 --> 00:12:50,946 Why didn't you put, "Six months later, the French bitch didn't show up"? 198 00:12:51,294 --> 00:12:52,807 No, but I did, I did. 199 00:12:53,087 --> 00:12:55,886 - You did? - Yeah. No. I made it more hopeful. 200 00:12:56,216 --> 00:12:58,650 I wrote this fictional version where you do show up. 201 00:12:58,969 --> 00:13:01,324 - Oh, what happens? - Well... 202 00:13:02,723 --> 00:13:04,281 What? 203 00:13:04,766 --> 00:13:07,645 We make love for about 10 days straight, that's one part of it. 204 00:13:07,937 --> 00:13:10,610 - Interesting. So the French slut, right? - Yeah, exactly. 205 00:13:10,940 --> 00:13:13,328 It's just then they get to know each other better... 206 00:13:13,609 --> 00:13:15,520 ... and realize they don't get along at all. 207 00:13:15,819 --> 00:13:18,971 - I like that. It's more real. - My editor didn't think that way. 208 00:13:19,282 --> 00:13:21,318 Everyone wants to believe in love. It sells. 209 00:13:21,576 --> 00:13:23,485 Yeah, exactly, so... 210 00:13:24,285 --> 00:13:26,753 So things are going well for you, right? I mean... 211 00:13:27,079 --> 00:13:30,152 - Your book is a bestseller in the U.S. - It's a tiny bestseller. 212 00:13:30,501 --> 00:13:32,412 - Oh, come on. - All right. Officially, yes. 213 00:13:32,711 --> 00:13:35,702 Most people haven't read Moby Dick. Why should they read my book? 214 00:13:36,005 --> 00:13:38,155 I haven't read Moby Dick and I liked your book. 215 00:13:38,424 --> 00:13:40,620 - Thanks. - Even though... 216 00:13:40,928 --> 00:13:43,567 ... I thought you idealized the night of it. 217 00:13:43,889 --> 00:13:45,527 Come on, it's fiction, right? 218 00:13:45,766 --> 00:13:47,358 - I'm supposed to... - I know, I know. 219 00:13:47,643 --> 00:13:50,716 I know. I thought there were times where you made me... 220 00:13:51,064 --> 00:13:55,262 Well, I mean, her, right? No, me. Okay, whatever. 221 00:13:55,610 --> 00:13:58,567 - A little bit neurotic. - You are a bit like that, aren't you? 222 00:13:58,904 --> 00:14:02,022 - You think I'm neurotic? - No, no, no. Come on, I'm kidding. 223 00:14:02,325 --> 00:14:04,122 Where did I do that? I didn't do that. 224 00:14:04,369 --> 00:14:06,963 Oh, maybe it's just me, you know... 225 00:14:07,247 --> 00:14:10,157 Reading something, knowing the character is based on you... 226 00:14:10,498 --> 00:14:13,058 ... it's both flattering and disturbing at the same time. 227 00:14:13,377 --> 00:14:14,810 How is it disturbing? 228 00:14:15,087 --> 00:14:19,125 I don't know. Just being part of someone else's memory. 229 00:14:19,465 --> 00:14:21,979 Seeing myself through your eyes. 230 00:14:22,260 --> 00:14:24,570 How long did it take you to write it? 231 00:14:25,639 --> 00:14:27,357 Three or four years, on and off. 232 00:14:27,641 --> 00:14:30,678 Wow, that's a really long time to be writing about one night. 233 00:14:31,019 --> 00:14:33,579 Yeah, I know. Tell me about it. 234 00:14:33,981 --> 00:14:36,337 I always assumed you had forgotten me. 235 00:14:36,860 --> 00:14:39,499 No, I had a pretty clear picture of you in my mind. 236 00:14:39,821 --> 00:14:42,129 - I have to tell you something. I just... - What? 237 00:14:42,406 --> 00:14:46,035 I've wanted to talk to you for so long that now... It's just surreal, you know? 238 00:14:46,410 --> 00:14:48,083 I feel like everything should be... 239 00:14:48,329 --> 00:14:50,638 How long do we have? Twenty minutes and 30 seconds? 240 00:14:50,957 --> 00:14:53,150 We got more than that. I wanna know about you. 241 00:14:53,457 --> 00:14:55,971 Tell me, what are you doing? What are you up to? 242 00:14:56,294 --> 00:15:00,732 Where to start? I work for Green Cross. It's an environmental organization. 243 00:15:01,133 --> 00:15:02,407 What are they all about? 244 00:15:02,676 --> 00:15:05,143 We basically work on different environment issues... 245 00:15:05,428 --> 00:15:07,942 ... from clean water to disarmament of chemical weapons. 246 00:15:08,222 --> 00:15:10,578 International laws that deal with the environment. 247 00:15:10,851 --> 00:15:13,126 - What do you do for them? - We're going this way. 248 00:15:13,645 --> 00:15:14,919 Different things. 249 00:15:15,189 --> 00:15:18,898 Like, last year I was in India for a while, working on a water-treatment plant. 250 00:15:19,860 --> 00:15:23,058 Well, the cotton industry there is a major source of pollution, so... 251 00:15:23,364 --> 00:15:26,161 I mean, it sounds like you're actually doing something. 252 00:15:26,492 --> 00:15:29,802 Most people, myself included, just sit around and bitch. 253 00:15:30,120 --> 00:15:34,592 You know, how America's consuming all the world's resources, SUVs suck... 254 00:15:34,959 --> 00:15:36,278 ... global warming is real... 255 00:15:36,544 --> 00:15:39,773 I'm relieved to hear you're not one of those "freedom fries" Americans. 256 00:15:40,087 --> 00:15:42,396 Hey, you know... But how'd you get into that? 257 00:15:42,674 --> 00:15:45,825 I came out of political science, hoping to work for the government. 258 00:15:46,178 --> 00:15:48,771 - And I did for a little while. Terrible. - Not good? 259 00:15:49,096 --> 00:15:52,566 Yeah, no. Anyway, I got really tired... Let's go this way. 260 00:15:52,934 --> 00:15:55,130 Having this endless conversation with friends... 261 00:15:55,395 --> 00:15:57,545 ... about how the world was falling to pieces. 262 00:15:57,856 --> 00:16:00,165 So I decided what I really wanted to do was... 263 00:16:00,484 --> 00:16:03,681 ... to find things that could be fixed and try to fix them, you know? 264 00:16:04,029 --> 00:16:07,625 You know, I always thought you'd be doing something cool like that. I did. 265 00:16:07,992 --> 00:16:12,701 Thanks. I just feel really, really lucky to be doing a job I like, you know? 266 00:16:13,121 --> 00:16:14,520 Yeah. 267 00:16:14,748 --> 00:16:19,300 I actually alternate in between thinking everything is irrevocably screwed up... 268 00:16:19,671 --> 00:16:21,864 ... and things might be getting better in ways. 269 00:16:22,171 --> 00:16:24,480 Better? How could you possibly say that? 270 00:16:24,757 --> 00:16:26,475 Well, I just mean, you know, like... 271 00:16:26,717 --> 00:16:30,233 I know it sounds weird, but there are things to be optimistic about. 272 00:16:30,597 --> 00:16:35,112 Okay... I know your book is selling, which is great, I'm very happy for you. 273 00:16:35,518 --> 00:16:38,636 But let me break the news to you: The world is a mess right now. 274 00:16:38,981 --> 00:16:41,370 From a Western view, things are getting a bit better. 275 00:16:41,692 --> 00:16:45,128 We're moving industry to developing nations where we can get cheap labor... 276 00:16:45,487 --> 00:16:48,604 ... free of any environmental laws. The weapon industry is booming. 277 00:16:48,907 --> 00:16:51,741 Five million people die a year from preventable water disease. 278 00:16:52,078 --> 00:16:54,956 How is the world getting better? I'm not angry, I'm not angry. 279 00:16:55,290 --> 00:16:57,280 But come on, I want to know. I'm interested. 280 00:16:57,583 --> 00:17:00,939 I realize that there are a lot of serious problems in the world. 281 00:17:01,296 --> 00:17:03,446 - Okay. Thank you. - I mean, I don't even have... 282 00:17:03,756 --> 00:17:06,985 ... one publisher in the Asian market. - Okay. All right. 283 00:17:07,800 --> 00:17:10,633 - Say stop. - What? Stop. 284 00:17:10,928 --> 00:17:14,683 Look, all I'm saying is there's more awareness. People are gonna fight back. 285 00:17:15,017 --> 00:17:17,894 The world might be getting better because people like you... 286 00:17:18,186 --> 00:17:19,744 ... are educated and speaking out. 287 00:17:20,271 --> 00:17:23,469 Even the very notion of conservation, environmental issues... 288 00:17:23,817 --> 00:17:26,092 ... weren't in the vocabulary till fairly recently. 289 00:17:26,361 --> 00:17:30,274 And they're becoming the norm and eventually might be what's expected. 290 00:17:30,657 --> 00:17:33,490 I agree with what you're saying, but at the same time it's dangerous. 291 00:17:33,827 --> 00:17:36,342 An imperialist country can use that kind of thinking... 292 00:17:36,623 --> 00:17:38,693 ... to justify their economic greed. 293 00:17:40,250 --> 00:17:44,129 Is there any particular imperialist country you have in mind, there, Frenchie? 294 00:17:44,463 --> 00:17:46,580 - No, not really. - No? 295 00:17:52,094 --> 00:17:55,450 - So you wanna sit over there? - Yeah, this is perfect. 296 00:17:55,973 --> 00:17:58,613 Oh, wow. Maybe what I'm saying is... 297 00:17:58,936 --> 00:18:01,734 ... the world might be evolving the way a person evolves. 298 00:18:02,022 --> 00:18:04,933 Like, I mean, me, for example. Am I getting worse? 299 00:18:05,233 --> 00:18:09,273 Am I improving? I don't know. When I was younger, I was healthier... 300 00:18:09,613 --> 00:18:12,002 ... but I was wracked with insecurity, you know? 301 00:18:12,741 --> 00:18:14,732 Now I'm older and my problems are deeper... 302 00:18:14,993 --> 00:18:16,790 ... but I'm more equipped to handle them. 303 00:18:17,621 --> 00:18:19,692 So, what are your problems? 304 00:18:21,334 --> 00:18:25,645 Right now I don't have any. I don't, you know? I'm just... 305 00:18:26,004 --> 00:18:27,676 ... damn happy to be here. 306 00:18:28,173 --> 00:18:29,686 Me too. 307 00:18:32,762 --> 00:18:34,912 So how long have you been in Paris? 308 00:18:35,223 --> 00:18:38,497 I got in last night. I've done 10 cities in 12 days. 309 00:18:38,850 --> 00:18:41,080 I'm wrecked. I'm so glad it's over, you know? 310 00:18:41,394 --> 00:18:42,794 I'm tired of being a huckster. 311 00:18:43,438 --> 00:18:44,871 - Hi. - Hello. 312 00:18:45,149 --> 00:18:46,582 What do you want? 313 00:18:46,859 --> 00:18:48,735 A cup of coffee. 314 00:18:52,572 --> 00:18:56,168 God, I love this cafe. I wish they had places like this in the U.S. 315 00:18:56,743 --> 00:18:59,132 Yeah, I missed cafes when I was living over there. 316 00:18:59,454 --> 00:19:02,207 I mean, I find a few places I really liked, but there was... 317 00:19:02,541 --> 00:19:06,376 - You were living in the U.S.? - Yes, from '96 to '99. 318 00:19:06,754 --> 00:19:08,267 I was studying at NYU. 319 00:19:08,715 --> 00:19:11,228 Oh, God, don't tell me that, Celine. 320 00:19:11,550 --> 00:19:13,506 - What? - No, it's just... 321 00:19:13,802 --> 00:19:15,441 - Nothing, I mean, I... - What? 322 00:19:15,680 --> 00:19:18,911 I've been living in New York since '98. We were there at the same time. 323 00:19:19,225 --> 00:19:20,738 - In New York? - Yeah. 324 00:19:20,975 --> 00:19:25,491 That's weird. It actually crossed my mind a few times that I might run into you... 325 00:19:25,855 --> 00:19:28,086 ... but the odds are so slim, right? So... 326 00:19:28,775 --> 00:19:30,606 I didn't even know what city you were in. 327 00:19:30,861 --> 00:19:34,216 - Weren't you somewhere in Texas? - Yeah, yeah, definitely. I just... 328 00:19:34,572 --> 00:19:37,929 I was for a long time. I just, you know, wanted to try New York. 329 00:19:40,120 --> 00:19:41,712 What brought you back here? 330 00:19:41,997 --> 00:19:43,908 I had finished my master's, for one... 331 00:19:44,208 --> 00:19:46,324 ... and no visa, no more visa. 332 00:19:46,627 --> 00:19:50,826 And I was starting to get paranoid. All the violence in the medias: 333 00:19:51,174 --> 00:19:54,291 Gang violence, murders, especially serial killers... 334 00:19:56,053 --> 00:19:57,645 But the final straw was... 335 00:19:57,930 --> 00:20:00,684 ... one night I heard some noise on my fire escape... 336 00:20:01,017 --> 00:20:03,451 ... so I called 911, and the cops came eventually. 337 00:20:03,770 --> 00:20:07,124 - Like three hours later. - Yeah, after I had been raped and killed. 338 00:20:07,897 --> 00:20:10,286 No, but it was a man and a woman officer. 339 00:20:10,608 --> 00:20:12,520 I was explaining what I had heard... 340 00:20:12,820 --> 00:20:15,015 ... when the woman had to go move the police car. 341 00:20:15,280 --> 00:20:16,917 I was left alone with the male cop. 342 00:20:17,156 --> 00:20:21,434 Right away he asked me if I had a gun, and I said, "No, of course not. " 343 00:20:21,828 --> 00:20:24,582 And he told me, "Well, you better think about getting one. 344 00:20:24,915 --> 00:20:28,112 This is America, not France. Okay?" 345 00:20:28,418 --> 00:20:31,410 And I said to him, "I have no idea how to shoot a gun... 346 00:20:31,755 --> 00:20:34,145 ... and I have no interest in firearms whatsoever. " 347 00:20:34,467 --> 00:20:38,096 And that's when he pulled out his gun, like this, and he went: 348 00:20:38,471 --> 00:20:43,703 "Well, one day, you're gonna have something like this in your face... 349 00:20:44,184 --> 00:20:46,415 ... and if you wanna have a long life... 350 00:20:47,105 --> 00:20:50,732 ... you're gonna have to choose between you or them. " 351 00:20:51,983 --> 00:20:56,182 And then they left. And the next morning I called for an application to get a gun. 352 00:20:56,572 --> 00:20:58,961 Me with a gun. I mean, that's really scary. 353 00:20:59,283 --> 00:21:01,319 But then I realized something was wrong. 354 00:21:01,617 --> 00:21:05,007 The way that cop had pulled his gun out, and everything, right? 355 00:21:05,371 --> 00:21:07,123 So I canceled my demand for the gun... 356 00:21:07,374 --> 00:21:10,366 ... and I called the police and tried to complain about that cop. 357 00:21:10,669 --> 00:21:13,137 - What happened with that? - It was so much paperwork... 358 00:21:13,422 --> 00:21:16,141 ... and then I got scared, with my shitty student visa... 359 00:21:16,425 --> 00:21:18,735 - Thought you'd get deported? - Exactly. I gave up... 360 00:21:19,012 --> 00:21:20,730 ... and forgot about the whole thing. 361 00:21:21,014 --> 00:21:24,449 - Well, I guess I never forgot. - Obviously. 362 00:21:24,808 --> 00:21:27,242 But still, you know, I really enjoyed being there. 363 00:21:27,561 --> 00:21:30,554 - There's lots of things I miss in the U.S. - Yeah? Like what? 364 00:21:32,650 --> 00:21:34,163 Well... 365 00:21:34,444 --> 00:21:36,831 The overall good mood people have there. 366 00:21:37,153 --> 00:21:39,144 Like, even if it can be bullshit sometimes. 367 00:21:39,405 --> 00:21:42,079 Like, "How you doing?" "Great. " "How you doing?" "Great !" 368 00:21:42,618 --> 00:21:44,654 "Have a great day !" 369 00:21:45,162 --> 00:21:48,631 I don't know. Parisians can be so grumpy. Have you noticed? 370 00:21:48,998 --> 00:21:51,512 No, everybody seems pretty happy to me. 371 00:21:52,336 --> 00:21:55,134 - They're not happy. No. - They're not happy? 372 00:21:55,422 --> 00:21:58,653 No, they are. I don't know. I just mean French men. They drive me nuts. 373 00:21:59,009 --> 00:22:00,328 What is it? What about them? 374 00:22:00,719 --> 00:22:03,598 Well, they're very nice. They're great, you know, to be around. 375 00:22:03,932 --> 00:22:05,843 They love food, wine, they're great cooks. 376 00:22:06,100 --> 00:22:08,011 But I've had really bad luck with them. 377 00:22:08,269 --> 00:22:09,826 Why? What do you mean? 378 00:22:10,729 --> 00:22:13,607 - Well, I guess they're not as... - What? 379 00:22:13,941 --> 00:22:15,455 What's the word? 380 00:22:16,569 --> 00:22:19,720 - Horny? They're not as horny. - Horny? 381 00:22:20,071 --> 00:22:24,189 Wait, listen to me on this one. In that regard, I am proud to be an American. 382 00:22:24,534 --> 00:22:26,366 And you should be. In that regard only. 383 00:22:27,621 --> 00:22:29,532 Have you ever spent time in Eastern Europe? 384 00:22:30,082 --> 00:22:32,470 Eastern... No, I don't. Thank you. 385 00:22:33,626 --> 00:22:36,094 I remember as a teenager I went to Warsaw... 386 00:22:36,379 --> 00:22:38,814 ... when it was still a strict communist regime. 387 00:22:39,132 --> 00:22:41,407 - Which I don't approve of at all. - Sure you don't. 388 00:22:41,718 --> 00:22:43,629 - No, I don't. - I'm just kidding. 389 00:22:43,887 --> 00:22:46,685 But anyway, something about being there was very interesting. 390 00:22:46,974 --> 00:22:50,092 After a couple of weeks, something changed in me. 391 00:22:50,395 --> 00:22:53,432 The city was quite gloomy and gray... 392 00:22:53,730 --> 00:22:56,369 ... but after a while, my brain seemed clearer. 393 00:22:56,650 --> 00:22:58,242 I was writing more in my journal... 394 00:22:58,527 --> 00:23:01,565 ... ideas I'd never thought of before... - Communist ideas? 395 00:23:01,906 --> 00:23:03,976 - Listen, I'm not... - I'm sorry, I... 396 00:23:04,284 --> 00:23:05,954 - Okay. - Go on. 397 00:23:06,242 --> 00:23:08,710 Okay. I'll send you to a gulag later. 398 00:23:08,995 --> 00:23:12,306 No. But it took me a while to figure out why I felt so different. 399 00:23:12,624 --> 00:23:15,184 One day, as I was walking through the Jewish cemetery... 400 00:23:15,460 --> 00:23:17,290 ... I don't know why, but it occurred to me there... 401 00:23:17,545 --> 00:23:21,254 ... I realized that I had spent the last two weeks away from most of my habits. 402 00:23:21,592 --> 00:23:23,503 TV was in a language I didn't understand... 403 00:23:23,760 --> 00:23:26,399 ... there was nothing to buy, no advertisements anywhere... 404 00:23:26,680 --> 00:23:28,238 ... so all I'd been doing was... 405 00:23:28,474 --> 00:23:33,026 ... walk around, think, and write. My brain felt like it was at rest... 406 00:23:33,438 --> 00:23:36,874 ... free from the consuming frenzy. It was almost like a natural high. 407 00:23:37,233 --> 00:23:41,589 I felt so peaceful inside. No strange urge to be somewhere else... 408 00:23:41,987 --> 00:23:43,261 ... to shop... 409 00:23:43,530 --> 00:23:45,567 It could have seemed like boredom at first... 410 00:23:45,825 --> 00:23:47,543 ... but it became very, very soulful. 411 00:23:48,620 --> 00:23:50,097 It was interesting, you know? 412 00:23:50,328 --> 00:23:53,525 Can you believe it was nine years ago we were walking around Vienna? 413 00:23:54,165 --> 00:23:57,715 - Nine years? No, that's impossible. - No, it was. It feels like two months. 414 00:23:58,086 --> 00:23:59,917 But it was summer '94. 415 00:24:02,215 --> 00:24:04,410 Do I look any different? 416 00:24:06,093 --> 00:24:07,732 I do? 417 00:24:08,597 --> 00:24:09,791 I'd have to see you naked. 418 00:24:10,224 --> 00:24:12,101 - What? - I know, I'm sorry. 419 00:24:12,392 --> 00:24:14,667 Your hair was different back then. It was like... 420 00:24:14,937 --> 00:24:17,246 - It's the same... Oh, down. - Yeah, take it down. 421 00:24:17,524 --> 00:24:19,196 Down. Okay, it was down. Okay. 422 00:24:19,484 --> 00:24:21,554 Well? Voila. 423 00:24:21,903 --> 00:24:23,335 So? 424 00:24:25,447 --> 00:24:26,846 Okay, come on. Tell me. 425 00:24:30,912 --> 00:24:33,380 Skinnier, I think. A little thinner. 426 00:24:34,539 --> 00:24:36,018 Did you think I was fat before? 427 00:24:36,290 --> 00:24:39,088 - No... - Yeah, you thought I was a fatty. 428 00:24:39,418 --> 00:24:43,298 No, you thought I was a fatty. You wrote a book about a fat French girl. 429 00:24:43,632 --> 00:24:45,462 - No, listen. - Oh, no. 430 00:24:45,758 --> 00:24:47,794 Seriously, all right? You look beautiful. 431 00:24:48,094 --> 00:24:50,005 Do I look any different? 432 00:24:50,429 --> 00:24:53,820 No. Not at all. Actually, you have this line. 433 00:24:54,184 --> 00:24:56,493 - I know. - It's like a scar. 434 00:24:56,812 --> 00:25:01,044 - A scar? Like a gunshot wound? - No, no, no. I like it. I'm sorry. 435 00:25:02,569 --> 00:25:07,165 I had this funny... Well, horrible dream the other day. 436 00:25:08,407 --> 00:25:12,286 I was having this awful nightmare that I was 32. 437 00:25:12,619 --> 00:25:15,692 And then I woke up, and I was 23. So relieved. 438 00:25:16,040 --> 00:25:18,508 And then I woke up for real, and I was 32. 439 00:25:18,835 --> 00:25:21,188 - Shit, man. It happens. - Scary. 440 00:25:21,502 --> 00:25:24,062 Time goes faster and faster. Apparently, it's because... 441 00:25:24,338 --> 00:25:27,649 ... we don't renew synapses after our 20s, so it's downhill from then on. 442 00:25:28,969 --> 00:25:31,846 I like getting older, you know? Life feels... 443 00:25:32,263 --> 00:25:35,653 I don't know, it feels more immediate. Like I can appreciate things more. 444 00:25:36,685 --> 00:25:39,153 No, me too, actually. I really love it. 445 00:25:39,730 --> 00:25:41,448 I was once... 446 00:25:41,732 --> 00:25:43,051 ... a drummer in a band. 447 00:25:43,317 --> 00:25:45,785 - You were? - Yeah. We were pretty good, actually. 448 00:25:46,111 --> 00:25:50,151 But the lead-singer guy, he was just so obsessed with us getting a record deal. 449 00:25:50,492 --> 00:25:53,324 It's all we talked about, thought about, getting bigger shows. 450 00:25:53,660 --> 00:25:57,016 Everything was just focused on the future all the time. And now... 451 00:25:57,331 --> 00:25:59,129 ... the band doesn't even exist anymore. 452 00:25:59,375 --> 00:26:01,650 And looking back at the shows we did play... 453 00:26:01,920 --> 00:26:04,716 ... even rehearsing, it was just so much fun. 454 00:26:05,004 --> 00:26:09,043 I just... Now I'd enjoy every minute of it. Could I have a drag of that? 455 00:26:09,468 --> 00:26:12,380 Well, your book has been published. That's a pretty big deal. 456 00:26:12,721 --> 00:26:15,837 You've been all around Europe. Are you enjoying every minute of it? 457 00:26:16,682 --> 00:26:18,479 - Not really. - Not really? 458 00:26:18,768 --> 00:26:20,087 No. 459 00:26:20,687 --> 00:26:23,247 - Do you have another one of those? - Yes, of course. 460 00:26:25,442 --> 00:26:26,921 Here. 461 00:26:27,861 --> 00:26:30,853 In my field, I see these people that... Oh, sorry. 462 00:26:31,198 --> 00:26:33,633 Come into it with big, idealist visions... 463 00:26:33,910 --> 00:26:36,549 ... of becoming the leader that will create a better world. 464 00:26:36,830 --> 00:26:38,945 They enjoy the goal, but not the process. 465 00:26:39,248 --> 00:26:41,045 - Right. - But the reality of it is... 466 00:26:41,291 --> 00:26:44,568 ... the true work of improving things is in the little achievements. 467 00:26:44,921 --> 00:26:47,754 - That's what you need to enjoy. - What do you mean, exactly? 468 00:26:48,091 --> 00:26:51,525 I was working for this organization that helped villages in Mexico. 469 00:26:52,343 --> 00:26:54,733 And their concerns was how to get the pencils... 470 00:26:55,013 --> 00:26:57,322 ... sent to the kid in those little country schools. 471 00:26:57,599 --> 00:27:01,273 It was not about big, revolutionary ideas. It was about pencils. 472 00:27:01,811 --> 00:27:05,121 I see the people that do the real work, and what's really sad is that... 473 00:27:05,649 --> 00:27:08,083 ... the people that are the most giving, hardworking... 474 00:27:08,360 --> 00:27:10,476 ... and capable of making this world better... 475 00:27:10,779 --> 00:27:13,771 ... usually don't have the ego and ambition to be a leader. 476 00:27:14,116 --> 00:27:16,631 They don't see any interest in superficial rewards. 477 00:27:16,953 --> 00:27:19,865 They don't care if their name ever appear in the press. 478 00:27:20,206 --> 00:27:22,878 They actually enjoy the process of helping others. 479 00:27:23,208 --> 00:27:25,802 - They're in the moment. - Yeah, but that's so hard... 480 00:27:26,086 --> 00:27:28,885 ... you know, to be in the moment. I mean, I feel like I'm... 481 00:27:29,174 --> 00:27:33,008 ... designed to be slightly dissatisfied with everything, you know? 482 00:27:33,343 --> 00:27:35,731 It's like always trying to better my situation. 483 00:27:36,053 --> 00:27:39,364 I satisfy one desire, and it just agitates another. 484 00:27:39,683 --> 00:27:43,073 And then I think, to hell with it, right? Desire's the fuel of life. 485 00:27:43,395 --> 00:27:46,113 You know? Do you think it's true... 486 00:27:46,439 --> 00:27:49,237 ... that if we never wanted anything, we'd never be unhappy? 487 00:27:49,567 --> 00:27:54,403 I don't know. Not wanting anything, isn't that a symptom of depression? 488 00:27:54,781 --> 00:27:58,251 Yeah, that is, right? I mean, it's healthy to desire, right? 489 00:27:58,619 --> 00:28:02,090 Yeah. I don't know. It's what all those Buddhist guys say, right? 490 00:28:02,457 --> 00:28:04,732 Liberate yourself from desire, and you'll find... 491 00:28:05,001 --> 00:28:08,072 ... you already have everything you need. - But I feel alive... 492 00:28:08,420 --> 00:28:11,093 ... when I want something more than basic survival needs. 493 00:28:11,381 --> 00:28:14,101 Wanting, whether it's intimacy with another person... 494 00:28:14,427 --> 00:28:16,099 ... or a pair of shoes, is beautiful. 495 00:28:16,387 --> 00:28:19,775 I like that we have those ever-renewing desires, you know? 496 00:28:20,139 --> 00:28:21,777 Maybe it's this sense of entitlement. 497 00:28:22,058 --> 00:28:25,654 You know, like whenever you feel like you deserve that new pair of shoes? 498 00:28:26,021 --> 00:28:29,729 It's okay to want things, as long as you aren't pissed off if you don't get them. 499 00:28:30,066 --> 00:28:31,863 Life's hard. It's supposed to be. 500 00:28:32,151 --> 00:28:35,030 If we didn't suffer, we wouldn't learn a thing, you know? 501 00:28:36,532 --> 00:28:38,363 So, what, are you Buddhist, or something? 502 00:28:39,493 --> 00:28:42,053 - No. - No? Why not? 503 00:28:42,579 --> 00:28:47,131 I don't know. The same reason I don't really consider myself anything, really. 504 00:28:47,710 --> 00:28:50,986 I decided a long time ago that I was gonna be open to everything... 505 00:28:51,339 --> 00:28:53,727 ... but not buy into any one and only belief system. 506 00:28:55,467 --> 00:28:58,460 I went to this Trappist monastery a couple years ago. 507 00:28:59,180 --> 00:29:02,887 - Trappist? - Yeah, they're Catholic. Cistercian. 508 00:29:03,307 --> 00:29:06,777 - Why did you do that? - Why? I'd been doing some reading. 509 00:29:07,145 --> 00:29:10,821 Thought it'd be cool. Have you ever spent any time with monks or nuns? 510 00:29:11,316 --> 00:29:14,512 - No. It's not really my style. - No? 511 00:29:15,444 --> 00:29:19,323 Well, I expected them to be all glowering and stern, but they weren't. 512 00:29:19,700 --> 00:29:22,168 They were quick to laugh, really easy to be around. 513 00:29:22,494 --> 00:29:25,372 Seriously, very attuned to everything, they were just... 514 00:29:25,747 --> 00:29:28,056 You know, they weren't trying to hustle anybody. 515 00:29:28,375 --> 00:29:30,764 They're trying to live and die in peace with God... 516 00:29:31,087 --> 00:29:33,476 ... or whatever part of them they feel is eternal. 517 00:29:33,798 --> 00:29:35,675 It was just so refreshing to be around. 518 00:29:35,925 --> 00:29:38,313 You realize that most of the people that you meet... 519 00:29:38,594 --> 00:29:40,312 ... are trying to get somewhere better. 520 00:29:40,554 --> 00:29:43,627 They're trying to make more cash, get a little more respect... 521 00:29:43,975 --> 00:29:46,284 ... have more people admire them. It's exhausting. 522 00:29:46,603 --> 00:29:49,593 - No kidding. - And it's exhausting to be one yourself. 523 00:29:49,937 --> 00:29:53,168 There I am, right, you know, all greedy to be more spiritual. 524 00:29:53,484 --> 00:29:56,920 "I want to be a better person, " you know? You can't escape. 525 00:29:57,237 --> 00:30:03,152 I had this boyfriend of mine many years ago that wanted to be a Buddhist. 526 00:30:03,784 --> 00:30:06,219 So he went to Asia to visit some of those monasteries. 527 00:30:06,538 --> 00:30:10,087 - I've thought about doing that too. - Yeah, you should. I'll tell you why. 528 00:30:10,459 --> 00:30:13,690 He was good-looking, and each time he went to one of the monasteries... 529 00:30:14,004 --> 00:30:16,519 ... a monk offered to suck his cock. 530 00:30:16,841 --> 00:30:18,479 True story. 531 00:30:19,010 --> 00:30:21,807 It all comes down to that, doesn't it? 532 00:30:22,137 --> 00:30:24,207 That's why I really admire what you're doing. 533 00:30:24,515 --> 00:30:26,551 - You know? - What do you mean? Sucking cock? 534 00:30:26,851 --> 00:30:29,888 - No. - No? Wrong answer. 535 00:30:30,188 --> 00:30:33,815 No, I was gonna say you're not detached from life. 536 00:30:34,190 --> 00:30:36,499 You're putting your passion into action. 537 00:30:36,818 --> 00:30:39,379 Well, I try. 538 00:30:40,113 --> 00:30:43,344 You know something? I'm gonna be on planes... 539 00:30:43,658 --> 00:30:45,888 ... and in an airport for the next eight hours... 540 00:30:46,202 --> 00:30:48,477 I'd just love to see a little bit more of Paris. 541 00:30:48,871 --> 00:30:50,271 - Would you walk with me? - Yeah. 542 00:30:50,499 --> 00:30:51,773 - Do you mind? - That's great. 543 00:30:52,042 --> 00:30:53,873 - Do you want to? - Let's do that. Yeah. 544 00:30:54,169 --> 00:30:55,921 What do we owe here? Four-fifty? 545 00:30:56,213 --> 00:30:58,647 No, I got it, I got a little per diem going on here. 546 00:30:58,924 --> 00:31:01,075 - This good, for a tip? - Yeah, that's fine. 547 00:31:01,386 --> 00:31:03,616 - That's more than enough. - Throw that in too. 548 00:31:03,972 --> 00:31:07,327 - Is there anywhere to go around here? - It's sales day today. 549 00:31:07,683 --> 00:31:10,481 - What's that? - It's when everything's on sale in Paris. 550 00:31:11,103 --> 00:31:12,457 It's twice a year. 551 00:31:15,024 --> 00:31:16,616 All right, let's go shopping. 552 00:31:16,860 --> 00:31:19,850 No, no, no. That's a bad idea. I don't wanna inflict that on you. 553 00:31:20,194 --> 00:31:23,949 It's madness. Let's just go to this garden path. It's really nice. 554 00:31:24,449 --> 00:31:26,758 All right. That sounds better than shopping, actually. 555 00:31:27,035 --> 00:31:29,070 Not that I wouldn't do whatever you wanted. 556 00:31:29,328 --> 00:31:32,206 Sometimes I don't even need to buy anything. I just get high... 557 00:31:32,498 --> 00:31:34,217 ... on trying on and looking at things. 558 00:31:34,459 --> 00:31:36,177 Is this where we're going? 559 00:31:36,420 --> 00:31:38,570 - Yeah. - A therapist will tell you that's good. 560 00:31:38,839 --> 00:31:41,114 - Really? Are you ever in therapy? - Oh, no. 561 00:31:41,425 --> 00:31:44,337 - Do I seem like I'm in therapy? - I'm kidding. 562 00:31:44,887 --> 00:31:48,563 - Does it help your sex problems? - My sex problems? 563 00:31:48,892 --> 00:31:50,371 - I'm kidding. - Tell me the truth. 564 00:31:50,643 --> 00:31:52,792 - We didn't have any problems. - No, I'm kidding. 565 00:31:53,103 --> 00:31:55,458 - We didn't even have sex. - That's a joke, right? 566 00:31:55,772 --> 00:31:58,333 No, we didn't. I mean, that was the whole thing. 567 00:31:58,610 --> 00:32:00,566 - Of course we did. - No, no, no, we didn't. 568 00:32:00,862 --> 00:32:03,533 You didn't have a condom and I never have sex without one. 569 00:32:03,863 --> 00:32:05,660 I'm extremely paranoid. There's no way... 570 00:32:05,948 --> 00:32:08,383 I find it scary that you don't remember what happened. 571 00:32:08,660 --> 00:32:09,979 No, listen... 572 00:32:10,204 --> 00:32:12,798 ... I didn't write an entire book, but I kept a journal... 573 00:32:13,123 --> 00:32:16,910 ... and I wrote the whole night in it. That's what I meant, you idealizing it. 574 00:32:17,251 --> 00:32:20,369 All right, listen, I even remember what brand of condom we used. 575 00:32:20,672 --> 00:32:22,503 That's disgusting. I don't wanna hear it. 576 00:32:22,758 --> 00:32:25,192 - That's not disgusting. - No. 577 00:32:25,552 --> 00:32:29,864 Okay, when I get home I'll check my journal from '94, but I know I'm right. 578 00:32:32,936 --> 00:32:34,767 - Wait a minute. - What? 579 00:32:35,021 --> 00:32:37,659 - Was it in the cemetery? - No. 580 00:32:37,981 --> 00:32:40,256 No, we went to the cemetery in the afternoon. 581 00:32:40,526 --> 00:32:43,325 It was in the park, very late at night. 582 00:32:43,822 --> 00:32:45,892 - In the park? - Wait a minute, wait a minute. 583 00:32:46,157 --> 00:32:47,907 I can't... I can't... 584 00:32:48,908 --> 00:32:52,059 Is it that forgettable? You really don't remember? In the park? 585 00:32:52,412 --> 00:32:55,131 Okay. Wait a minute, I think you might be right... 586 00:32:55,457 --> 00:32:56,731 You're messing with me now. 587 00:32:57,000 --> 00:32:58,318 - No. - Are you messing with me? 588 00:32:58,584 --> 00:33:01,621 Okay. No, I'm sorry. I think... I mean, you're right, okay? 589 00:33:01,963 --> 00:33:05,274 Sometimes I put things in drawers inside my head and forget about it. 590 00:33:05,634 --> 00:33:08,194 It's less painful to put things away than live with it. 591 00:33:08,512 --> 00:33:11,106 What, so that night was, like, a sad memory for you? 592 00:33:11,431 --> 00:33:13,183 I didn't mean that night in particular. 593 00:33:13,433 --> 00:33:15,425 I meant certain things are better forgotten. 594 00:33:15,728 --> 00:33:18,117 I remember that night better than I do entire years. 595 00:33:18,439 --> 00:33:20,157 - Me too. - Really? 596 00:33:20,399 --> 00:33:22,469 Well, I thought I did. 597 00:33:25,195 --> 00:33:28,711 But maybe I... Maybe I put it away because of the fact that... 598 00:33:29,033 --> 00:33:32,023 ... my grandmother's funeral was the day we were supposed to meet. 599 00:33:32,368 --> 00:33:35,201 It was a tough day for me, but it must've been worse for you. 600 00:33:35,538 --> 00:33:39,930 It was unreal. I remember looking at her dead body in the coffin... 601 00:33:40,294 --> 00:33:44,491 ... at her beautiful hands, so warm, so sweet, that used to hold me... 602 00:33:45,173 --> 00:33:48,325 ... but nothing in that coffin resembled what I remembered of her. 603 00:33:48,635 --> 00:33:50,148 All the warmth was gone. 604 00:33:50,471 --> 00:33:53,144 And then I was crying, so confused if I was crying... 605 00:33:53,432 --> 00:33:58,790 ... because I was never gonna see her again or never gonna see you again... 606 00:33:59,229 --> 00:34:02,905 I'm sorry. I'm sorry to go on like this. I've been a little down this week. 607 00:34:03,276 --> 00:34:06,153 - Why? - I don't know. Nothing bad, just... 608 00:34:06,487 --> 00:34:08,364 Reading your book, maybe? 609 00:34:08,614 --> 00:34:12,324 No, but... Thinking of how hopeful I was that summer and fall... 610 00:34:12,702 --> 00:34:14,818 ... and since then it's been kind of a... 611 00:34:15,497 --> 00:34:16,848 I don't know. 612 00:34:17,079 --> 00:34:21,072 Memory is a wonderful thing if you don't have to deal with the past. 613 00:34:23,962 --> 00:34:26,681 "Memory is wonderful if you don't have to deal with the past. " 614 00:34:26,965 --> 00:34:28,556 Can I put that on a bumper sticker? 615 00:34:28,799 --> 00:34:31,393 If you wrote a book about our night, that's a good title. 616 00:34:31,677 --> 00:34:35,387 - And it could be a total different book. - Yeah, there'd be no sex scenes. 617 00:34:36,141 --> 00:34:37,415 - But you know what? - What? 618 00:34:37,684 --> 00:34:39,003 Now that we've met again... 619 00:34:39,269 --> 00:34:41,783 ... we can change our memory of that December 16. 620 00:34:42,064 --> 00:34:45,341 It no longer has that sad ending of us never seeing each other again. 621 00:34:45,693 --> 00:34:49,970 Right. I mean, I guess a memory's never finished as long as you're alive. 622 00:34:50,364 --> 00:34:53,800 Yeah, I know. I have this memory from my childhood... 623 00:34:54,159 --> 00:34:56,628 ... I realized recently never happened. - What? 624 00:34:56,913 --> 00:34:59,746 Well, when I was 8 or 9, my mom was so paranoid... 625 00:35:00,041 --> 00:35:02,792 ... when I was walking home from my piano lesson at night... 626 00:35:03,084 --> 00:35:05,678 ... she'd warn me about dirty old men giving me candies... 627 00:35:05,962 --> 00:35:07,715 ... and then showing me their pee-pees. 628 00:35:07,965 --> 00:35:10,923 She was so obsessed with it that, later in life, you know... 629 00:35:11,218 --> 00:35:14,493 ... I had this image in my head that this really happened. 630 00:35:14,804 --> 00:35:18,195 To the point that I even associated sex with that walk home. 631 00:35:18,517 --> 00:35:22,066 I mean, and sometimes, even now, when I'm... 632 00:35:23,105 --> 00:35:26,893 When I'm having sex, I see myself walking down that street. 633 00:35:27,234 --> 00:35:29,066 I swear. It's so weird, right? 634 00:35:29,320 --> 00:35:33,359 - Is that street nearby? I mean, could...? - Could we? No. 635 00:35:33,700 --> 00:35:35,815 Very far. 636 00:35:37,077 --> 00:35:39,511 Did you ever keep a journal when you were a kid? 637 00:35:39,788 --> 00:35:42,986 Yeah. On and off, I guess. 638 00:35:43,293 --> 00:35:45,363 It's funny, I read one of mine... 639 00:35:45,628 --> 00:35:47,423 ... from '83 the other day. - Yeah? 640 00:35:47,837 --> 00:35:49,429 And what really surprised me is... 641 00:35:49,672 --> 00:35:52,471 ... that I was dealing with life the same way I am now. 642 00:35:52,801 --> 00:35:54,712 I was much more hopeful and naive... 643 00:35:54,970 --> 00:35:59,087 ... but the core, and the way I was feeling things, is exactly the same. 644 00:35:59,432 --> 00:36:01,662 It made me realize I haven't changed much at all. 645 00:36:01,934 --> 00:36:03,368 I don't think anybody does. 646 00:36:03,604 --> 00:36:07,233 People don't want to admit it, but it's like we have these innate set points... 647 00:36:07,566 --> 00:36:11,036 ... and nothing much that happens to us changes our disposition. 648 00:36:11,361 --> 00:36:12,760 - You believe that? - I think so. 649 00:36:12,988 --> 00:36:16,186 I read this study where they followed people who'd won the lottery... 650 00:36:16,493 --> 00:36:18,290 ... and people who'd become paraplegics. 651 00:36:18,536 --> 00:36:22,528 You'd think one extreme is gonna make you euphoric and the other suicidal. 652 00:36:22,873 --> 00:36:25,468 But the study shows that, after about six months... 653 00:36:25,752 --> 00:36:28,903 ... as soon as people had gotten used to their new situation... 654 00:36:29,214 --> 00:36:31,442 ... they were, more or less, the same. - The same? 655 00:36:31,714 --> 00:36:34,786 Yeah. Like, if they were basically an optimistic, jovial person... 656 00:36:35,092 --> 00:36:37,812 ... they're now an optimistic, jovial person in a wheelchair. 657 00:36:38,138 --> 00:36:40,015 If they're a petty, miserable asshole... 658 00:36:40,265 --> 00:36:44,052 ... they're a petty, miserable asshole with a new Cadillac, a house and a boat. 659 00:36:44,393 --> 00:36:47,591 So I'll be forever depressed no matter what great things happen? 660 00:36:47,898 --> 00:36:49,217 - Definitely. - Great. 661 00:36:49,441 --> 00:36:51,079 No, come on, are you depressed now? 662 00:36:51,318 --> 00:36:53,513 No, no, I'm not depressed. 663 00:36:53,779 --> 00:36:56,339 But sometimes I worry I'll get to the end of my life... 664 00:36:56,615 --> 00:37:00,006 ... feeling I haven't done all I wanted to. - Well, what do you want to do? 665 00:37:00,328 --> 00:37:01,966 I... 666 00:37:02,205 --> 00:37:05,116 I want to paint more, I want to play my guitar every day. 667 00:37:05,415 --> 00:37:08,487 I want to learn Chinese. I want to write more songs. 668 00:37:08,794 --> 00:37:12,947 There's so many things I want to do, and I end up doing not much. 669 00:37:14,050 --> 00:37:19,645 All right, well, let me ask you this: Do you believe in ghosts or spirits? 670 00:37:20,054 --> 00:37:21,374 No. 671 00:37:21,598 --> 00:37:22,872 - No? - No. 672 00:37:23,100 --> 00:37:26,694 - Okay, what about reincarnation? - Not at all. 673 00:37:27,019 --> 00:37:28,896 - God? - No. 674 00:37:29,147 --> 00:37:31,536 - All right. - That sounds terrible. No, no, no. 675 00:37:31,816 --> 00:37:35,571 But I don't want to be one of those people that don't believe in any magic. 676 00:37:35,904 --> 00:37:37,735 - So then, astrology? - Yes, of course ! 677 00:37:37,990 --> 00:37:39,742 - There we go. - That makes sense, right? 678 00:37:39,992 --> 00:37:43,268 You're a Scorpio, I'm a Sag, we get along. 679 00:37:44,330 --> 00:37:46,082 No, no, no. 680 00:37:46,332 --> 00:37:49,243 There's an Einstein quote I really, really like. 681 00:37:49,543 --> 00:37:52,899 He said, "If you don't believe in any kind of magic or mystery 682 00:37:53,213 --> 00:37:55,933 you're basically as good as dead. " - Yeah, I like that. 683 00:37:56,217 --> 00:37:59,414 I've always felt there was some kind of mystical core to the universe. 684 00:37:59,721 --> 00:38:04,713 But, more recently, I've started to think that, me, my personality, whatever... 685 00:38:05,099 --> 00:38:08,058 That I don't have any permanent place here, you know. 686 00:38:08,353 --> 00:38:09,945 In eternity or whatever, you know. 687 00:38:10,189 --> 00:38:13,863 And the more I think that, I can't go through life saying this is no big deal. 688 00:38:14,192 --> 00:38:17,549 This is it. This is actually happening. What do you think is interesting? 689 00:38:17,863 --> 00:38:19,933 What do you think is funny? What is important? 690 00:38:20,240 --> 00:38:22,435 You know, every day's our last. 691 00:38:22,910 --> 00:38:26,266 When I feel that way, I usually call my mom to tell her I love her. 692 00:38:26,580 --> 00:38:28,139 - Yeah? - And she's always: 693 00:38:28,374 --> 00:38:32,333 "Are you okay? Do you have cancer? Are you gonna commit suicide?" 694 00:38:32,670 --> 00:38:35,183 It's almost not worth it. 695 00:38:36,507 --> 00:38:39,180 So, what about us? 696 00:38:39,469 --> 00:38:41,903 - What about us? - No, what I mean is... 697 00:38:42,180 --> 00:38:45,614 ... if we were both going to die tonight... - Like the apocalypse was coming? 698 00:38:45,932 --> 00:38:49,891 No, that's too dramatic... But what if just the two of us were going to die? 699 00:38:50,228 --> 00:38:52,106 I mean, would we talk about your book? 700 00:38:52,356 --> 00:38:54,995 - The environment? Or... - If today was our last day? 701 00:38:55,275 --> 00:38:57,788 Yeah, what would we talk about? What would you tell me? 702 00:38:58,069 --> 00:38:59,548 - Well... - That's hard, huh? 703 00:38:59,779 --> 00:39:01,053 - No, no, I'll do it. - Okay. 704 00:39:01,280 --> 00:39:03,636 I definitely would stop talking about my book. 705 00:39:03,909 --> 00:39:06,469 - I would probably drop the environment. - Okay. 706 00:39:06,745 --> 00:39:10,533 But I would still want to talk about, you know, the magic in the universe. 707 00:39:10,874 --> 00:39:13,947 - I'd just want to do it from a... - What? 708 00:39:14,254 --> 00:39:15,812 ... a hotel room, you know... 709 00:39:16,047 --> 00:39:19,675 ... in between sessions of us wildly fucking until we die. 710 00:39:20,008 --> 00:39:22,727 Wow. Well, why waste time with an hotel room? 711 00:39:23,011 --> 00:39:26,288 Why not do it right there on a bench? 712 00:39:27,183 --> 00:39:29,458 Come here, come here, come here. 713 00:39:29,725 --> 00:39:32,034 Okay. We're not gonna die tonight. 714 00:39:32,311 --> 00:39:34,267 All right. Too bad. I'm sorry. 715 00:39:34,522 --> 00:39:36,002 That was an extreme example. 716 00:39:36,233 --> 00:39:38,588 - I'm sorry. - Okay. 717 00:39:38,861 --> 00:39:40,453 What I... My point was, you know... 718 00:39:40,696 --> 00:39:43,414 ... to truly communicate with people is very hard to do. 719 00:39:43,698 --> 00:39:46,371 No, I know, most of our day-to-day exchanges... 720 00:39:46,660 --> 00:39:48,139 Yeah, no, I mean... 721 00:39:48,370 --> 00:39:50,884 ... not to bring everything back to sex... - But why not? 722 00:39:51,165 --> 00:39:54,157 No, this example, this friend of mine, she was talking about... 723 00:39:54,459 --> 00:39:57,371 - She and her boyfriend... Problems in bed. - Right. 724 00:39:57,714 --> 00:40:01,070 And how when they had been dating for a year she started telling him... 725 00:40:01,384 --> 00:40:04,261 ... what he could do to please her more, and it freaked him out. 726 00:40:04,553 --> 00:40:05,827 - Why? - Totally. 727 00:40:06,096 --> 00:40:08,007 He thought it meant he was a bad lover... 728 00:40:08,265 --> 00:40:10,063 Maybe she shouldn't have waited so long. 729 00:40:10,310 --> 00:40:12,585 - After a year... - But men are so easily offended. 730 00:40:12,854 --> 00:40:15,241 - What, more than women? - Definitely on that subject. 731 00:40:15,521 --> 00:40:16,840 - You think so? - Yeah, yeah. 732 00:40:17,648 --> 00:40:19,684 Well, maybe it's because, you know... 733 00:40:19,942 --> 00:40:23,822 ... men are easier to... To please. - To please? 734 00:40:24,198 --> 00:40:27,075 - Well, I don't know. - Yeah, they are. They're definitely. 735 00:40:27,408 --> 00:40:29,444 Anyway, this friend, she was telling me... 736 00:40:29,702 --> 00:40:33,218 ... next time she dates a man, she's gonna make a little questionnaire... 737 00:40:33,540 --> 00:40:36,850 ... about what they like and dislike... - What, written down, or out loud? 738 00:40:37,169 --> 00:40:38,841 Yeah, mostly written down. 739 00:40:39,087 --> 00:40:42,603 But it wouldn't be just yes or no. It would be a bit more complex than that. 740 00:40:42,926 --> 00:40:46,282 Like, for example, if the question is: "Are you into S & M?" 741 00:40:46,596 --> 00:40:51,225 The answer could be: "No, but a good spanking once in a while doesn't hurt. " 742 00:40:51,600 --> 00:40:55,150 Right, or like: "Do you like talking dirty in bed?" 743 00:40:55,480 --> 00:40:58,790 - That kind of thing? - Yeah, but not just like any dirty talk. 744 00:40:59,108 --> 00:41:01,381 Just "What specific word would you like to hear?" 745 00:41:01,651 --> 00:41:02,925 - What, me? - Well, yeah. 746 00:41:03,152 --> 00:41:05,713 For example what specific word would you like to hear? 747 00:41:05,989 --> 00:41:07,547 I don't know. 748 00:41:09,117 --> 00:41:11,550 What do you feel about the word "pussy"? 749 00:41:11,828 --> 00:41:14,501 I love it. 750 00:41:14,997 --> 00:41:16,590 Good. 751 00:41:16,834 --> 00:41:19,712 It's amazing what perverts we've become in the past nine years. 752 00:41:20,003 --> 00:41:23,154 At least now we don't have to pretend each new sexual experience... 753 00:41:23,465 --> 00:41:25,103 ... is, like, a life-altering event. 754 00:41:25,342 --> 00:41:28,699 I know. By now, you've stuck it in so many places it's about to fall off. 755 00:41:29,013 --> 00:41:32,562 And I can't realistically expect you've become anything but a total ho. 756 00:41:32,891 --> 00:41:36,167 - Yeah, thank you. - No, I'm s... 757 00:41:36,895 --> 00:41:39,774 - That's true. What can you do? - What can you do? 758 00:41:40,066 --> 00:41:43,695 So, what kind of songs do you write? I didn't know you did that. 759 00:41:44,026 --> 00:41:45,175 - What kind? - Yeah, sure. 760 00:41:45,403 --> 00:41:46,995 - I don't know, just songs. - Like? 761 00:41:47,238 --> 00:41:49,799 Like, some are about, you know, people. 762 00:41:50,075 --> 00:41:51,667 Relationships. One's about my cat. 763 00:41:51,910 --> 00:41:54,299 - Sing one. - No, I can't. I don't have a guitar. 764 00:41:54,580 --> 00:41:56,092 - Come on. A cappella. - No, no, no. 765 00:41:56,330 --> 00:41:59,367 I'm not singing a song without a guitar. You're nuts. 766 00:42:00,001 --> 00:42:01,833 Why not? 767 00:42:02,087 --> 00:42:04,442 - No, okay. Not now. No. - One. 768 00:42:04,715 --> 00:42:07,832 If not now, when? You want to meet here in six months with a guitar? 769 00:42:08,135 --> 00:42:09,568 I'll fly all the way over here. 770 00:42:09,803 --> 00:42:12,682 - You may or may not make the Metro. - Okay, that's funny. 771 00:42:13,183 --> 00:42:15,174 - We've got to get back. - We'll be all right. 772 00:42:15,435 --> 00:42:17,346 - You're gonna miss your flight. - All right. 773 00:42:17,603 --> 00:42:19,355 We can walk down La Seine. It's nice. 774 00:42:19,605 --> 00:42:21,118 Okay. 775 00:42:21,773 --> 00:42:25,323 - So you're flying back to New York? - Yeah, yeah. 776 00:42:27,363 --> 00:42:31,149 So I read in that article that you're married with a kid. That's great. 777 00:42:31,491 --> 00:42:33,880 Yeah, he's... He's 4. 778 00:42:34,160 --> 00:42:36,277 - What's his name? - Henry. Little Hank. 779 00:42:36,538 --> 00:42:39,211 - He's so much fun. - Oh, wow, I'm sure. 780 00:42:39,500 --> 00:42:42,332 - Your wife, what does she do? - She teaches elementary school. 781 00:42:43,002 --> 00:42:45,470 - Do you have kids? - Yes, two... Shit ! 782 00:42:45,756 --> 00:42:47,155 - What? - I left them in the car ! 783 00:42:47,382 --> 00:42:49,942 With the windows up, six months ago ! Think they're okay? 784 00:42:50,219 --> 00:42:52,733 No, I'm kidding. No, but I want to have kids someday. 785 00:42:53,013 --> 00:42:54,810 - I'm just not ready yet. - No? 786 00:42:55,057 --> 00:42:58,095 - I'm in a good relationship, though. - Oh yeah? That's good. 787 00:42:58,394 --> 00:43:00,385 - What's he do? - He's a photojournalist. 788 00:43:00,647 --> 00:43:02,398 He does war coverage. 789 00:43:02,648 --> 00:43:05,116 He's away a lot, which is good because I'm so busy. 790 00:43:05,400 --> 00:43:09,314 But isn't that dangerous? Aren't a lot of those guys getting killed these days? 791 00:43:09,656 --> 00:43:12,773 He promises me he doesn't take risks, but I often worry. 792 00:43:13,076 --> 00:43:15,508 He goes in this trance when he photographs something. 793 00:43:15,785 --> 00:43:18,982 - What do you mean? - Well, once we were in New Delhi... 794 00:43:19,289 --> 00:43:20,722 ... and we passed a bum on the... 795 00:43:20,958 --> 00:43:23,108 - A bomb? - A bum. A homeless. 796 00:43:23,377 --> 00:43:24,651 All right, right. 797 00:43:24,877 --> 00:43:28,552 He looked like he needed help, but his first reaction was to photograph him. 798 00:43:28,881 --> 00:43:31,601 He went really close to his face, fixing his collar... 799 00:43:31,885 --> 00:43:33,557 ... totally detached from the person. 800 00:43:33,804 --> 00:43:36,443 But don't you have to be like that to be good at that job? 801 00:43:36,723 --> 00:43:37,997 Yeah, I mean, I'm not... 802 00:43:38,225 --> 00:43:41,217 I'm not judging him. What he does is essential and incredible. 803 00:43:41,521 --> 00:43:43,557 All I'm saying is that I could never do it. 804 00:43:43,815 --> 00:43:45,487 Let's get on that boat. Come on. 805 00:43:45,733 --> 00:43:47,007 - No ! - Come on, it'll be fun. 806 00:43:47,234 --> 00:43:49,464 - You don't have time ! - They're about to take off. 807 00:43:49,736 --> 00:43:52,045 I've got 50 more minutes. Do you have a cell phone? 808 00:43:52,322 --> 00:43:54,553 - Yeah. - All right, I've got that driver's number. 809 00:43:54,826 --> 00:43:56,896 I can call him to pick us up at the next stop. 810 00:43:57,162 --> 00:44:00,869 I've never been on those boats. It's for tourists, it's embarrassing. 811 00:44:01,205 --> 00:44:02,479 Okay. All right. 812 00:44:05,961 --> 00:44:07,519 No, I'll get it, I'll get it. 813 00:44:08,380 --> 00:44:10,847 All right. All right, all right. 814 00:44:14,469 --> 00:44:15,744 Thank you. 815 00:44:15,971 --> 00:44:18,041 - So are you in love with that guy? - What guy? 816 00:44:18,307 --> 00:44:21,504 - The war photographer. - Yes, of course. 817 00:44:25,439 --> 00:44:27,556 So do you have that cell phone? 818 00:44:27,817 --> 00:44:29,489 Oh, yeah. 819 00:44:29,736 --> 00:44:31,488 - Okay, let's see... - Okay. 820 00:44:31,738 --> 00:44:33,011 What do I tell him? 821 00:44:33,238 --> 00:44:35,354 Tell him to pick you up at Quai Henri Quatre. 822 00:44:35,616 --> 00:44:38,290 Oh, shit. Quai...? 823 00:44:38,578 --> 00:44:41,251 Henri Quatre. Quai Henri Quatre. 824 00:44:41,539 --> 00:44:43,493 Henri Quatre. 825 00:44:43,748 --> 00:44:46,626 What's wrong with you? No, do you want me to...? Henri Quatre. 826 00:44:46,918 --> 00:44:48,237 - Henry Four? - Yes ! 827 00:44:48,461 --> 00:44:51,340 - Come on, why didn't you say so? - I'm sorry. Okay. 828 00:45:03,602 --> 00:45:05,433 Yeah, is this Philippe? 829 00:45:05,687 --> 00:45:08,247 Yeah. Philippe, this is Jesse Wallace. 830 00:45:08,524 --> 00:45:09,843 Yeah. 831 00:45:10,067 --> 00:45:14,141 Well, listen, I'm on one of those boats, right? 832 00:45:14,489 --> 00:45:17,286 And we're gonna arrive at Henry Four. 833 00:45:17,574 --> 00:45:20,805 At Port Henry Four. You know what that is? 834 00:45:21,119 --> 00:45:23,509 All right, great. And you have my bags, right? 835 00:45:23,790 --> 00:45:26,623 Yeah, so we'll be there in... I don't know, it's the next stop. 836 00:45:26,918 --> 00:45:29,191 Okay. Au revoir. 837 00:45:30,378 --> 00:45:32,733 - It's okay? - Yeah, yeah. 838 00:45:33,005 --> 00:45:34,883 Oh, wow. 839 00:45:35,134 --> 00:45:37,728 - Notre Dame, man. Check that out. - Oh, wow. 840 00:45:38,011 --> 00:45:41,844 I heard this story once about when the Germans were occupying Paris... 841 00:45:42,181 --> 00:45:43,739 ... and they had to retreat back. 842 00:45:43,975 --> 00:45:45,853 They wired Notre Dame to blow... 843 00:45:46,103 --> 00:45:50,176 ... but they had to leave one guy in charge of hitting the switch. 844 00:45:50,524 --> 00:45:53,482 And the guy, the soldier, he couldn't do it. 845 00:45:53,777 --> 00:45:57,327 He just sat there, knocked out by how beautiful the place was. 846 00:45:57,657 --> 00:45:59,454 Then, when the Allied troops came in... 847 00:45:59,701 --> 00:46:03,056 ... they found all the explosives lying there and the switch unturned... 848 00:46:03,370 --> 00:46:06,885 ... and they found the same thing at the Sacre-Coeur, Eiffel Tower... 849 00:46:07,208 --> 00:46:09,403 ... couple other places, I think. 850 00:46:09,669 --> 00:46:11,546 Is that true? 851 00:46:11,796 --> 00:46:14,752 I don't know. I always liked the story, though. 852 00:46:15,047 --> 00:46:16,366 Yeah, that's a great story. 853 00:46:16,632 --> 00:46:19,386 But you have to think that Notre Dame will be gone one day. 854 00:46:19,678 --> 00:46:22,715 There used to be another church at the Seine, right there. 855 00:46:23,015 --> 00:46:25,733 - What, right in the same spot? - Yeah. 856 00:46:27,310 --> 00:46:29,666 You know, this is great. I've never done this. 857 00:46:29,938 --> 00:46:32,452 - Yeah. - I forget about how beautiful Paris is. 858 00:46:32,733 --> 00:46:34,291 It's not so bad, being a tourist. 859 00:46:34,526 --> 00:46:36,915 - Thanks for getting me on the boat. - You're welcome. 860 00:46:37,196 --> 00:46:39,994 I think that book that I wrote was like building something... 861 00:46:40,617 --> 00:46:44,610 ... so that I wouldn't forget the details of the time that we spent together. 862 00:46:44,996 --> 00:46:48,590 You know, like, just as a reminder, that once, we really did meet. 863 00:46:48,916 --> 00:46:51,749 You know, that this was real, this happened. 864 00:46:52,045 --> 00:46:53,956 I'm happy you're saying that, because... 865 00:46:54,214 --> 00:46:58,330 I mean, I always feel like a freak because I'm never able to move on like this: 866 00:46:59,634 --> 00:47:02,785 People just have an affair, or even entire relationships... 867 00:47:03,138 --> 00:47:05,413 ... they break up and they forget. 868 00:47:05,682 --> 00:47:09,390 They move on like they would have changed brand of cereals. 869 00:47:10,186 --> 00:47:13,303 I feel I was never able to forget anyone I've been with... 870 00:47:13,606 --> 00:47:18,965 ... because each person had their own specific qualities. 871 00:47:19,363 --> 00:47:23,993 You can never replace anyone. What is lost is lost. 872 00:47:25,370 --> 00:47:29,363 Each relationship, when it ends, really damages me. I never fully recover. 873 00:47:29,707 --> 00:47:32,743 That's why I'm very careful with getting involved... 874 00:47:33,043 --> 00:47:34,999 ... because it hurts too much. 875 00:47:35,254 --> 00:47:38,292 Even getting laid, I actually don't do that... 876 00:47:38,591 --> 00:47:41,389 ... because I will miss of the person the most mundane things. 877 00:47:41,678 --> 00:47:44,270 Like I'm obsessed with little things. 878 00:47:44,720 --> 00:47:46,950 Maybe I'm crazy, but when I was a little girl... 879 00:47:47,223 --> 00:47:50,022 ... my mom told me that I was always late to school. 880 00:47:50,310 --> 00:47:52,585 One day she followed me to see why. 881 00:47:52,896 --> 00:47:57,013 I was looking at chestnuts falling from the trees, rolling on the sidewalk... 882 00:47:57,358 --> 00:48:02,877 ... or ants crossing the road, the way a leaf casts a shadow on a tree trunk. 883 00:48:03,282 --> 00:48:05,238 Little things. 884 00:48:05,826 --> 00:48:07,578 I think it's the same with people. 885 00:48:08,162 --> 00:48:10,961 I see in them little details, so specific to each of them... 886 00:48:11,249 --> 00:48:15,208 ... that move me and that I miss and will always miss. 887 00:48:15,545 --> 00:48:16,977 You can never replace anyone... 888 00:48:17,212 --> 00:48:21,000 ... because everyone is made of such beautiful, specific details. 889 00:48:24,637 --> 00:48:27,786 Like, I remember the way your beard has a bit of red in it... 890 00:48:28,681 --> 00:48:31,241 ... and how the sun was making it glow... 891 00:48:31,559 --> 00:48:34,233 ... that morning right before you left. 892 00:48:35,272 --> 00:48:39,025 I remembered that, and I missed it. 893 00:48:39,358 --> 00:48:40,632 Really crazy, right? 894 00:48:41,319 --> 00:48:45,074 Now I know for sure. You wanna know why I wrote that stupid book? 895 00:48:45,449 --> 00:48:48,247 - Why? - So you'd come to a reading in Paris... 896 00:48:48,577 --> 00:48:52,570 ... and I could walk up to you and ask, "Where the fuck were you?" 897 00:48:53,165 --> 00:48:55,282 No... You think I'd be here today? 898 00:48:55,543 --> 00:48:59,900 I'm serious. I think I wrote it, in a way, to try to find you. 899 00:49:00,298 --> 00:49:02,288 Okay, that's... I know that's not true... 900 00:49:02,549 --> 00:49:04,779 ... but that's sweet of you. - I think it is true. 901 00:49:05,093 --> 00:49:07,449 What were the chances of us ever meeting again? 902 00:49:08,348 --> 00:49:11,420 After that December, I'd say almost zero. 903 00:49:11,974 --> 00:49:13,930 But we're not real anyway, right? 904 00:49:14,185 --> 00:49:17,257 We're just characters in that old lady's dream. 905 00:49:17,564 --> 00:49:19,873 She's on her deathbed, fantasizing about her youth. 906 00:49:20,150 --> 00:49:22,141 So of course we had to meet again. 907 00:49:22,402 --> 00:49:26,155 Oh, God. Why weren't you there in Vienna? 908 00:49:27,490 --> 00:49:31,086 - I told you why. - I know why, I just... 909 00:49:31,411 --> 00:49:33,561 I wish you would have been. 910 00:49:33,831 --> 00:49:35,981 Our lives might have been so much different. 911 00:49:36,250 --> 00:49:38,366 You think so? 912 00:49:38,627 --> 00:49:40,186 I actually do. 913 00:49:40,463 --> 00:49:43,455 Maybe not. Maybe we would have hated each other eventually. 914 00:49:43,800 --> 00:49:46,552 What, like we hate each other now? 915 00:49:47,594 --> 00:49:51,907 You know, maybe we're... We're only good at brief encounters... 916 00:49:52,267 --> 00:49:56,306 ... walking around in European cities, in warm climate. 917 00:49:56,978 --> 00:49:59,970 Oh, God. Why didn't we exchange phone numbers and stuff? 918 00:50:00,273 --> 00:50:02,344 Why didn't we do that? 919 00:50:02,609 --> 00:50:04,884 Because we were young and stupid. 920 00:50:05,154 --> 00:50:07,349 Do you think we still are? 921 00:50:07,614 --> 00:50:09,649 I guess when you're young you just believe... 922 00:50:09,907 --> 00:50:12,341 ... there'll be many people you'll connect with. 923 00:50:13,119 --> 00:50:15,634 Later in life you realize it only happens a few times. 924 00:50:15,914 --> 00:50:19,384 And you can screw it up, you know. Misconnect. 925 00:50:19,751 --> 00:50:22,060 The past is the past. It was meant to be that way. 926 00:50:22,337 --> 00:50:24,898 You really believe that? That everything's fated? 927 00:50:25,175 --> 00:50:29,009 Well, you know, the world might be less free than we think. 928 00:50:29,345 --> 00:50:30,982 Yeah? 929 00:50:31,305 --> 00:50:35,059 When given these exact circumstances, that's what will happen every time. 930 00:50:35,392 --> 00:50:38,305 Two part hydrogen, one part oxygen, you'll get water every time. 931 00:50:38,605 --> 00:50:41,879 No, I mean, what if your grandmother had lived a week longer, you know? 932 00:50:42,190 --> 00:50:44,704 Or passed away a week earlier? Days, even? 933 00:50:44,984 --> 00:50:46,497 Things might have been different. 934 00:50:46,736 --> 00:50:50,776 - You can't think like that, it's... - You shouldn't on most things, but... 935 00:50:51,116 --> 00:50:56,109 It's just, on this one, it seemed like something was off, you know. 936 00:50:56,829 --> 00:51:00,425 In the months leading up to my wedding, I was thinking about you all the time. 937 00:51:00,751 --> 00:51:04,426 Even on my way there, I'm in the car, a buddy of mine is driving me downtown... 938 00:51:04,755 --> 00:51:07,394 ... and I'm staring out the window and I think I see you... 939 00:51:07,674 --> 00:51:09,745 ... not far from the church, right... 940 00:51:10,011 --> 00:51:12,400 ... folding up an umbrella and walking into a deli... 941 00:51:12,680 --> 00:51:16,149 ... on the corner of 13th and Broadway. 942 00:51:16,475 --> 00:51:19,865 And I thought I was going crazy. But now I think it probably was you. 943 00:51:20,814 --> 00:51:23,328 I lived on 11th and Broadway. 944 00:51:24,234 --> 00:51:26,029 You see? 945 00:51:27,401 --> 00:51:30,996 So, what is it like to be married? You haven't talked much about that. 946 00:51:32,074 --> 00:51:35,464 I haven't? How weird. 947 00:51:36,119 --> 00:51:39,906 I don't know. We met, you know, when I was in college. 948 00:51:40,248 --> 00:51:46,358 And we broke up and got back together for a period of years, and then... 949 00:51:47,256 --> 00:51:51,295 What? We were sort of back together and she was pregnant... 950 00:51:52,136 --> 00:51:53,649 ... so marriage. 951 00:51:53,887 --> 00:51:55,844 What is she like? 952 00:51:56,099 --> 00:51:59,011 She's a great teacher, a good mom. 953 00:51:59,310 --> 00:52:02,221 She's smart, pretty, you know. 954 00:52:02,521 --> 00:52:04,512 I remember thinking at the time... 955 00:52:04,773 --> 00:52:07,049 ... that so many of the men that I admired most... 956 00:52:07,318 --> 00:52:11,946 ... that their lives were dedicated to something greater than themselves. 957 00:52:12,905 --> 00:52:15,499 So you got married because men you admired were married? 958 00:52:15,783 --> 00:52:21,780 No, no. It's more like I had this... This idea of my best self, you know? 959 00:52:22,206 --> 00:52:23,878 And I wanted to pursue that... 960 00:52:24,125 --> 00:52:26,764 ... even if it might have been overriding my honest self. 961 00:52:27,044 --> 00:52:28,398 You know what I'm saying? 962 00:52:28,630 --> 00:52:32,987 In the moment, I remember thinking it didn't much matter, the who of it all. 963 00:52:33,385 --> 00:52:35,774 I mean, that nobody is gonna be everything to you... 964 00:52:36,054 --> 00:52:38,808 ... and that it's just the action of committing yourself... 965 00:52:39,100 --> 00:52:42,456 ... you know, meeting your responsibilities, that matters. 966 00:52:42,770 --> 00:52:46,239 I mean, what is love, right, if it's not respect, trust, admiration? 967 00:52:46,565 --> 00:52:49,523 And I... I felt all those things. 968 00:52:49,818 --> 00:52:52,572 Cut to the present, and I feel like I'm running a nursery... 969 00:52:52,864 --> 00:52:55,424 ... with somebody I used to date, you know. 970 00:52:55,698 --> 00:52:57,450 I mean, I'm like a monk, you know. 971 00:52:57,700 --> 00:53:02,377 I mean, I've had sex less than 10 times in the last four years. 972 00:53:03,081 --> 00:53:05,549 - What, what? You laughing at me? - No. 973 00:53:05,834 --> 00:53:08,552 - It sounds pathetic? - What monastery do monks have sex...? 974 00:53:08,836 --> 00:53:12,033 Okay, you're right, I'm doing better than most monks. 975 00:53:12,341 --> 00:53:14,730 But I do, I feel like if somebody were to touch me... 976 00:53:15,010 --> 00:53:17,126 ... I would dissolve into molecules. 977 00:53:17,387 --> 00:53:20,026 Well, we're here. We've gotta go. Come on. 978 00:53:20,307 --> 00:53:22,104 Shit. 979 00:53:34,696 --> 00:53:37,530 - I'm sorry to hear that, you know. - What? 980 00:53:37,826 --> 00:53:40,782 You're not that happy with your marriage. 981 00:53:41,077 --> 00:53:43,637 - This friend of mine, she's a shrink... - How's she doing? 982 00:53:43,913 --> 00:53:45,426 She's a mess, but... 983 00:53:45,665 --> 00:53:48,783 No, she said she's been dealing with couples that are breaking up... 984 00:53:49,086 --> 00:53:51,156 ... for the same reason. - What reason is that? 985 00:53:51,421 --> 00:53:54,059 They all expected, after a few years of living together... 986 00:53:54,340 --> 00:53:56,570 ... for the passion, that desire, to be the same. 987 00:53:56,843 --> 00:53:58,243 - Yeah, right. - It's impossible. 988 00:53:58,470 --> 00:53:59,744 And thank God... 989 00:53:59,972 --> 00:54:03,567 ... we'd end up with aneurysms in that constant state of excitement, right? 990 00:54:03,892 --> 00:54:05,610 We'd do nothing at all with our lives. 991 00:54:05,853 --> 00:54:09,210 Would you have finished your book if you were fucking every five minutes? 992 00:54:09,524 --> 00:54:11,992 I might have welcomed the challenge, I mean... 993 00:54:12,318 --> 00:54:14,956 It's natural for your wife after the birth of your son... 994 00:54:15,237 --> 00:54:17,751 ... to give all her love to the little one. - Of course. 995 00:54:18,031 --> 00:54:21,069 If she was obsessed with sex, riding you like a wildcat... 996 00:54:21,369 --> 00:54:23,041 That wouldn't make any sense, right? 997 00:54:23,288 --> 00:54:26,722 Everything you're saying makes sense. It's not about sex. 998 00:54:27,039 --> 00:54:29,155 No, I know. It's obvious. 999 00:54:29,417 --> 00:54:30,931 I... 1000 00:54:32,129 --> 00:54:35,201 You know, couples are so confused lately. 1001 00:54:35,507 --> 00:54:37,701 I think it must be that... 1002 00:54:37,967 --> 00:54:41,755 ... men need to feel essential and they don't anymore. 1003 00:54:42,097 --> 00:54:44,531 It's been imprinted in their head for so many years... 1004 00:54:44,808 --> 00:54:46,446 ... that they had to be the provider. 1005 00:54:46,685 --> 00:54:50,200 Like, I'm a strong, independent woman in my professional life. 1006 00:54:50,522 --> 00:54:52,001 I don't need a man to feed me... 1007 00:54:52,232 --> 00:54:55,430 ... but I still need a man to love me and that I could love. 1008 00:54:56,946 --> 00:54:59,505 - So your driver's here. - Yeah. 1009 00:54:59,823 --> 00:55:01,415 Well, I guess this is goodbye. 1010 00:55:01,658 --> 00:55:03,250 - You better give me your... - No, no. 1011 00:55:03,494 --> 00:55:05,611 Why don't we just give you a ride home? 1012 00:55:05,872 --> 00:55:08,102 - Well, I can take the Metro. I'm fine. - No, I... 1013 00:55:08,374 --> 00:55:11,205 My flight's not until 10. I'll be arriving two hours early. 1014 00:55:11,501 --> 00:55:12,854 This way we can keep talking. 1015 00:55:13,085 --> 00:55:15,121 - Monsieur, can...? - It's not on the way. 1016 00:55:29,978 --> 00:55:31,809 You told him where you are and all that? 1017 00:55:32,064 --> 00:55:33,622 Yeah. 1018 00:55:37,027 --> 00:55:39,383 - He knows where he's going? - Yes. 1019 00:55:39,656 --> 00:55:41,453 Glad somebody does. 1020 00:55:41,699 --> 00:55:45,657 - But this is better than the Metro, right? - Definitely. 1021 00:55:48,247 --> 00:55:52,480 I was thinking, for me it's better I don't romanticize things as much anymore. 1022 00:55:52,836 --> 00:55:54,631 I was suffering so much all the time. 1023 00:55:54,877 --> 00:55:58,233 I still have lots of dreams, but they're not in regard to my love life. 1024 00:55:58,589 --> 00:56:00,865 It doesn't make me sad, it's just the way it is. 1025 00:56:01,176 --> 00:56:05,135 Is that why you're in a relationship with somebody who's never around? 1026 00:56:05,472 --> 00:56:09,225 Yes, obviously I can't deal with the day-to-day life of a relationship. 1027 00:56:09,559 --> 00:56:11,551 Yeah, we have this exciting time together... 1028 00:56:11,812 --> 00:56:15,043 ... and he leaves and I miss him, but at least I'm not dying inside. 1029 00:56:15,357 --> 00:56:17,666 When someone's always around me, I'm suffocating. 1030 00:56:17,985 --> 00:56:20,738 No, wait, you just said that you need to love and be loved. 1031 00:56:21,071 --> 00:56:23,791 Yeah, but when I do, it quickly makes me nauseous. 1032 00:56:24,075 --> 00:56:25,474 It's a disaster. 1033 00:56:25,702 --> 00:56:28,261 I mean, I'm really happy only when I'm on my own. 1034 00:56:28,537 --> 00:56:33,213 Even being alone, it's better than sitting next to a lover and feeling lonely. 1035 00:56:34,085 --> 00:56:35,916 It's not so easy for me to be a romantic. 1036 00:56:36,171 --> 00:56:39,525 You start off that way, and after you've been screwed over a few times... 1037 00:56:39,839 --> 00:56:43,991 ... you forget about your delusional ideas and you take what comes into your life. 1038 00:56:44,844 --> 00:56:47,234 That's not even true. I haven't been screwed over... 1039 00:56:47,514 --> 00:56:49,823 ... I've just had too many blah relationships. 1040 00:56:50,100 --> 00:56:51,851 They weren't mean, they cared for me... 1041 00:56:52,101 --> 00:56:55,457 ... but there were no real connection or excitement. 1042 00:56:55,771 --> 00:56:57,842 At least, not from my side. 1043 00:56:58,108 --> 00:57:00,668 God, I'm sorry, is it really that bad? 1044 00:57:00,944 --> 00:57:02,900 It's not, right? 1045 00:57:04,239 --> 00:57:06,878 You know, it's not even that. I was... 1046 00:57:07,159 --> 00:57:10,197 I was fine until I read your fucking book. 1047 00:57:10,830 --> 00:57:12,422 It stirred shit up, you know? 1048 00:57:12,874 --> 00:57:15,387 It reminded me how genuinely romantic I was... 1049 00:57:15,667 --> 00:57:17,737 ... how I had so much hope in things... 1050 00:57:18,003 --> 00:57:21,394 ... and now it's like I don't believe in anything that relates to love. 1051 00:57:21,716 --> 00:57:23,627 I don't feel things for people anymore. 1052 00:57:24,842 --> 00:57:28,357 In a way, I put all my romanticism into that one night... 1053 00:57:28,679 --> 00:57:31,069 ... and I was never able to feel all this again. 1054 00:57:31,350 --> 00:57:33,784 Like, somehow this night took things away from me... 1055 00:57:34,061 --> 00:57:36,369 ... and I expressed them to you, and you took them with you. 1056 00:57:36,646 --> 00:57:38,443 It made me feel cold, like love wasn't for me. 1057 00:57:38,689 --> 00:57:41,329 I don't believe that. I don't believe that. 1058 00:57:42,694 --> 00:57:46,767 You know what? Reality and love are almost contradictory for me. 1059 00:57:47,115 --> 00:57:51,233 It's funny, every single of my exes, they're now married. 1060 00:57:51,578 --> 00:57:54,377 Men go out with me, we break up, and then they get married. 1061 00:57:54,666 --> 00:57:58,021 And later they call me to thank me for teaching them what love is... 1062 00:57:58,335 --> 00:58:00,724 ... and that I taught them to care and respect women. 1063 00:58:01,004 --> 00:58:03,279 - I think I'm one of those. - I want to kill them ! 1064 00:58:03,591 --> 00:58:07,061 Why didn't they ask me? I would have said no, but they could have asked ! 1065 00:58:07,387 --> 00:58:11,014 I know it's my fault because I never felt it was the right man. 1066 00:58:11,389 --> 00:58:14,461 Never. But what does it mean, the right man, the love of your life? 1067 00:58:14,768 --> 00:58:17,965 The concept is absurd. We can only be complete with another person. 1068 00:58:18,313 --> 00:58:20,587 - It's evil, right? - Can I talk? 1069 00:58:20,857 --> 00:58:24,133 I guess I've been heartbroken too many times and then I recovered. 1070 00:58:24,443 --> 00:58:26,958 So now, you know, from the starts, I make no effort. 1071 00:58:27,239 --> 00:58:29,912 - I know it's not gonna work out. - You can't do that. 1072 00:58:30,242 --> 00:58:32,039 You can't live trying to avoid pain... 1073 00:58:32,327 --> 00:58:34,045 ... at the expense... - Those are words. 1074 00:58:34,288 --> 00:58:35,687 I've gotta get away from you. 1075 00:58:35,956 --> 00:58:37,993 - Stop the car, I wanna get out. - No, don't... 1076 00:58:38,293 --> 00:58:40,090 - Keep talking. - It's being around you. 1077 00:58:40,336 --> 00:58:42,610 Don't touch me, you know. I want to get on a cab. 1078 00:58:45,424 --> 00:58:47,733 No, don't. No, no, keep going. 1079 00:58:48,010 --> 00:58:51,447 Listen, I'm just so happy... Thank you, just keep going. 1080 00:58:51,764 --> 00:58:53,402 All right. 1081 00:58:54,807 --> 00:58:58,402 Look, I'm just so happy, all right, to be with you. 1082 00:58:58,728 --> 00:59:01,960 I am. I'm so glad you didn't forget about me, okay? 1083 00:59:02,274 --> 00:59:04,868 No, I didn't. And it pisses me off, okay? 1084 00:59:05,193 --> 00:59:08,708 You come here to Paris, all romantic, and married. 1085 00:59:09,030 --> 00:59:10,429 Okay? Screw you. 1086 00:59:11,325 --> 00:59:13,600 Don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to get you. 1087 00:59:13,869 --> 00:59:16,224 I mean, all I need is a married man. 1088 00:59:16,955 --> 00:59:20,152 There's been so much water under the bridge, it's not even about you. 1089 00:59:20,459 --> 00:59:22,815 It's about that moment in time that's forever gone. 1090 00:59:23,129 --> 00:59:25,927 You say that, but you didn't even remember having sex, so... 1091 00:59:26,216 --> 00:59:28,968 Of course I remembered. 1092 00:59:30,219 --> 00:59:32,528 - You did? - Yes. 1093 00:59:32,805 --> 00:59:36,037 - Women pretend things like that. - They do? 1094 00:59:36,392 --> 00:59:40,178 What was I supposed to say? That I remember the wine in the park... 1095 00:59:40,520 --> 00:59:43,876 ... and us looking up at the stars fading away as the sun came up? 1096 00:59:44,191 --> 00:59:47,422 We had sex twice, you idiot ! 1097 00:59:48,946 --> 00:59:52,574 All right, you know what, I'm just happy to see you. 1098 00:59:52,949 --> 00:59:56,226 Even if you've become an angry, manic-depressive activist... 1099 00:59:56,537 --> 00:59:59,893 ... I still like you, I still enjoy being around you. 1100 01:00:00,707 --> 01:00:04,905 And I feel the same. I'm sorry. I don't know what happened, I just... 1101 01:00:05,254 --> 01:00:07,610 - I had to let it all out. - Don't worry about it. 1102 01:00:07,882 --> 01:00:10,396 I'm so miserable in my love life, in my relationship. 1103 01:00:10,677 --> 01:00:13,713 I always act as... Like, you know, I'm detached. 1104 01:00:14,012 --> 01:00:17,049 But I'm dying inside. I'm dying because I'm so numb. 1105 01:00:17,349 --> 01:00:20,945 I don't feel pain or excitement, I'm not even bitter, I'm just... 1106 01:00:21,271 --> 01:00:23,829 You think you're the one dying inside? 1107 01:00:24,105 --> 01:00:28,144 My life is 24/7 bad. 1108 01:00:28,484 --> 01:00:29,759 - I'm sorry. - No, no. 1109 01:00:29,987 --> 01:00:32,785 I mean, the only happiness I get is when I'm out with my son. 1110 01:00:33,073 --> 01:00:34,664 I've been to marriage counseling... 1111 01:00:34,907 --> 01:00:37,421 ... I've done things I never thought I would have to do. 1112 01:00:37,702 --> 01:00:40,536 I've lit candles, bought self-help books, lingerie. 1113 01:00:40,831 --> 01:00:43,106 - Did the candles help? - Hell, no. 1114 01:00:43,375 --> 01:00:45,764 I don't love her the way she needs to be loved... 1115 01:00:46,044 --> 01:00:50,322 ... and I don't even see a future for us, but then I look at my little boy... 1116 01:00:50,674 --> 01:00:53,906 ... sitting across from me, and I think I'd suffer any torture... 1117 01:00:54,220 --> 01:00:56,495 ... to be with him for all the minutes of his life. 1118 01:00:56,764 --> 01:00:58,560 I don't want to miss out on one. 1119 01:00:58,807 --> 01:01:02,960 But then, there's no joy or laughter in my home, you know? 1120 01:01:03,313 --> 01:01:06,862 - I don't want him growing up in that. - No laughter? That's terrible. 1121 01:01:07,192 --> 01:01:09,021 My parents have been together 35 years... 1122 01:01:09,275 --> 01:01:11,505 ... and even when they fight they end up laughing. 1123 01:01:11,777 --> 01:01:15,407 I don't want to be one of those people who are getting divorced at 52... 1124 01:01:15,741 --> 01:01:19,972 ... and falling down into tears, admitting they never really loved their spouse... 1125 01:01:20,328 --> 01:01:25,164 ... and they feel their life has been sucked up into a vacuum cleaner. 1126 01:01:25,584 --> 01:01:29,020 You know, I want a great life. I want her to have a great life... 1127 01:01:29,379 --> 01:01:31,449 ... she deserves that. 1128 01:01:31,757 --> 01:01:34,954 But we're just living in the pretense of a marriage, responsibility... 1129 01:01:35,260 --> 01:01:39,095 ... you know, all these ideas of how people are supposed to live. 1130 01:01:40,975 --> 01:01:44,683 But then I... I have these dreams... 1131 01:01:46,355 --> 01:01:47,675 What dreams? 1132 01:01:47,899 --> 01:01:51,255 I have these dreams, you know, that... 1133 01:01:51,861 --> 01:01:53,770 ... I'm standing on a platform... 1134 01:01:55,154 --> 01:01:58,146 ... and you keep going by on a train... 1135 01:01:58,450 --> 01:02:02,682 ... and you go by, and you go by, and you go by, you go by. 1136 01:02:03,038 --> 01:02:04,834 And I wake up with the fucking sweats. 1137 01:02:05,081 --> 01:02:07,276 And then I have this other dream... 1138 01:02:07,583 --> 01:02:11,259 ... where you're pregnant in bed beside me naked... 1139 01:02:11,630 --> 01:02:15,259 ... and I want so badly to touch you, but you tell me not to and you look away. 1140 01:02:15,592 --> 01:02:19,904 And I... And I touch you anyway... 1141 01:02:20,264 --> 01:02:24,543 ... right on your ankle, and your skin is so soft that I wake up in sobs, all right? 1142 01:02:25,478 --> 01:02:28,787 My wife is there looking at me, and I feel I'm a million miles from her. 1143 01:02:29,106 --> 01:02:32,986 And I know that there's something wrong, that I... 1144 01:02:33,319 --> 01:02:35,230 God, that I can't keep living like this... 1145 01:02:35,488 --> 01:02:37,920 ... that there's gotta be more to love than commitment. 1146 01:02:38,239 --> 01:02:40,912 But then I think that I might have given up... 1147 01:02:41,200 --> 01:02:43,031 ... on the whole idea of romantic love. 1148 01:02:43,287 --> 01:02:46,438 That I might have put it to bed that... 1149 01:02:46,748 --> 01:02:49,386 That day when you weren't there. 1150 01:02:49,667 --> 01:02:52,306 You know, I think I might have done that. 1151 01:02:53,671 --> 01:02:55,788 Why are you telling me all this? 1152 01:02:56,758 --> 01:03:00,797 I'm sorry. I don't know. I'm... I should... 1153 01:03:02,139 --> 01:03:04,016 I shouldn't have. 1154 01:03:04,266 --> 01:03:05,780 You know, it's so weird. 1155 01:03:06,019 --> 01:03:09,898 People think they are the only one going through tough times. 1156 01:03:10,273 --> 01:03:14,390 I mean, when I read the article, I thought your life was perfect. 1157 01:03:14,860 --> 01:03:18,615 A wife, a kid, published author. 1158 01:03:19,407 --> 01:03:22,636 But your personal life is more of a mess than mine. 1159 01:03:22,950 --> 01:03:25,180 I'm sorry. 1160 01:03:25,453 --> 01:03:28,446 Well, I'm glad it's good for something. 1161 01:03:31,293 --> 01:03:34,409 - This is where you live? - Yeah. 1162 01:03:35,463 --> 01:03:39,457 So you're just relieved that I'm in even more deep shit than you are? 1163 01:03:39,802 --> 01:03:41,599 Yes, you've made me feel better. 1164 01:03:41,845 --> 01:03:43,915 Oh, good, I'm glad. 1165 01:03:44,181 --> 01:03:46,536 No, I really wish you the best. 1166 01:03:46,809 --> 01:03:50,325 It's not because I'm incapable of having a good relationship or a family... 1167 01:03:50,647 --> 01:03:52,683 ... that I wish everyone to be doomed like me. 1168 01:03:52,941 --> 01:03:55,216 I'm sure you'd make... Be a great mom someday. 1169 01:03:55,485 --> 01:03:56,917 - Really? You think so? - Yeah... 1170 01:03:57,152 --> 01:04:00,144 ... a few antidepressants, you know, you'll do great. 1171 01:04:01,073 --> 01:04:03,793 - Okay, say stop. - Stop. 1172 01:04:04,369 --> 01:04:06,963 - Okay. - You ready? Okay. 1173 01:04:17,214 --> 01:04:21,252 - So I want to try something. - What? 1174 01:04:23,886 --> 01:04:28,039 I want to see if you stay together or if you dissolve into molecules. 1175 01:04:29,268 --> 01:04:31,145 How am I doing? 1176 01:04:31,395 --> 01:04:33,226 Still here. 1177 01:04:33,480 --> 01:04:35,551 Good. I like being here. 1178 01:04:39,529 --> 01:04:41,041 Is this your apartment? 1179 01:04:41,280 --> 01:04:42,918 No, I live down there. 1180 01:04:43,157 --> 01:04:45,307 - Down there? - Yeah. 1181 01:04:45,576 --> 01:04:47,966 Monsieur, I'm gonna walk her to her door. 1182 01:04:57,128 --> 01:04:58,403 This is incredible. 1183 01:04:58,630 --> 01:05:01,224 - This is where you live? - Yeah. 1184 01:05:01,508 --> 01:05:04,579 - How long have you been here? - Four years. 1185 01:05:06,262 --> 01:05:08,332 - So tell me... - What? 1186 01:05:08,598 --> 01:05:10,191 Is it all true about your dreams... 1187 01:05:10,434 --> 01:05:13,073 ... or did you say that to hopefully get in my pants? 1188 01:05:13,353 --> 01:05:14,866 I said that to get in your pants. 1189 01:05:15,105 --> 01:05:17,494 - I use that all the time. - Oh, okay. Does it work? 1190 01:05:17,816 --> 01:05:20,570 You know. Sometimes. 1191 01:05:21,863 --> 01:05:25,219 Here's my kitty. Oh, so cute. Look at him. 1192 01:05:25,532 --> 01:05:27,284 You know what I love about this cat? 1193 01:05:27,534 --> 01:05:29,729 Every morning I bring him to the courtyard... 1194 01:05:30,037 --> 01:05:34,554 ... and every single morning he looks at everything like it was the first time. 1195 01:05:34,918 --> 01:05:38,829 Every corner, every tree, every plant. 1196 01:05:39,170 --> 01:05:41,525 Smells everything with his little cute nose. 1197 01:05:41,798 --> 01:05:45,712 Oh, I love my kitty. I love my kitty. 1198 01:05:47,137 --> 01:05:48,933 - What's his name? - Che. 1199 01:05:49,680 --> 01:05:51,477 Che? 1200 01:05:53,226 --> 01:05:55,536 - What? - Commie. 1201 01:05:57,105 --> 01:05:59,983 No, "che" in Argentina means "hey. " 1202 01:06:00,275 --> 01:06:02,584 - Okay. - Yes. 1203 01:06:02,861 --> 01:06:06,457 Oh, baby. Oh, yes, yes, yes. 1204 01:06:09,953 --> 01:06:13,627 We're having a little party. It's so much fun. 1205 01:06:23,965 --> 01:06:25,717 - So... - So. 1206 01:06:41,984 --> 01:06:46,262 You know what? I was thinking, would you play me one of your songs? 1207 01:06:46,613 --> 01:06:48,683 - You're gonna miss your flight. - I won't. 1208 01:06:48,949 --> 01:06:51,748 I'm gonna be in the airport for over an hour, reading... 1209 01:06:52,036 --> 01:06:54,834 ... wishing you'd played me one of your songs. 1210 01:06:55,164 --> 01:06:57,280 One song? Okay, but quickly. 1211 01:06:57,541 --> 01:06:59,259 Okay. 1212 01:07:04,674 --> 01:07:07,744 God, I love these old staircases. 1213 01:07:46,174 --> 01:07:48,369 - Hold this. - What, for me? 1214 01:07:48,635 --> 01:07:50,591 Hey there, buddy. 1215 01:07:51,761 --> 01:07:53,752 Che. 1216 01:08:05,316 --> 01:08:08,946 - Would you like some tea? - Yeah, sure. 1217 01:08:09,613 --> 01:08:11,171 Wow. 1218 01:08:12,241 --> 01:08:15,597 - Is chamomile okay? - Yeah. Great. 1219 01:08:15,911 --> 01:08:18,061 - Merci. - Messy? 1220 01:08:18,330 --> 01:08:21,926 - You think my apartment is messy? - No, no. Merci. 1221 01:08:22,252 --> 01:08:25,641 - Merci beaucoup. - Ah, merci. 1222 01:08:25,963 --> 01:08:29,558 I meant to tell you, your French has improved a lot. 1223 01:08:29,883 --> 01:08:31,158 - Really? - Yeah. 1224 01:08:31,386 --> 01:08:33,854 Yeah, you've really mastered the language. 1225 01:08:34,764 --> 01:08:37,754 All right, all right, what song are you gonna play me? 1226 01:08:40,101 --> 01:08:42,900 No, I can't. It's too embarrassing. It's been... 1227 01:08:43,188 --> 01:08:46,737 Whoa. No way. No way. I came up here, you cannot crap out on me now. 1228 01:08:47,066 --> 01:08:49,022 One song. Anything will be great. 1229 01:08:49,318 --> 01:08:51,036 But listen, you're gonna laugh at me. 1230 01:08:51,279 --> 01:08:52,713 - You think so? - Yes. 1231 01:08:52,990 --> 01:08:54,901 I doubt it. 1232 01:08:57,744 --> 01:08:59,097 Okay. 1233 01:08:59,329 --> 01:09:01,604 What do you want to hear? I have... 1234 01:09:01,874 --> 01:09:04,105 I have three songs in English. 1235 01:09:04,377 --> 01:09:05,696 One's about my cat... 1236 01:09:05,920 --> 01:09:09,832 ... one's about my ex-boyfriend... Well, ex-ex-boyfriend... 1237 01:09:10,174 --> 01:09:12,563 ... and there's one about... 1238 01:09:13,051 --> 01:09:16,283 Well, it's just a little waltz. 1239 01:09:16,598 --> 01:09:18,634 A waltz? Yeah. 1240 01:09:18,933 --> 01:09:20,967 - Play the waltz. - Right. 1241 01:09:21,267 --> 01:09:23,576 I haven't played it in a while. You sure? 1242 01:09:27,024 --> 01:09:28,503 Okay. 1243 01:09:29,318 --> 01:09:31,513 All right, the waltz. 1244 01:09:43,832 --> 01:09:48,144 Let me sing you a waltz 1245 01:09:48,505 --> 01:09:53,056 Out of nowhere, out of my thoughts 1246 01:09:53,426 --> 01:09:57,782 Let me sing you a waltz 1247 01:09:58,138 --> 01:10:01,848 About this one-night stand 1248 01:10:03,102 --> 01:10:08,572 You were, for me, that night 1249 01:10:08,981 --> 01:10:14,659 Everything I always dreamt of in life 1250 01:10:15,072 --> 01:10:18,461 But now you're gone 1251 01:10:18,783 --> 01:10:22,857 You are far-gone 1252 01:10:24,039 --> 01:10:28,510 All the way to your island of rain 1253 01:10:28,877 --> 01:10:34,510 It was, for you, just a one-night thing 1254 01:10:34,926 --> 01:10:37,759 But you were much more to me 1255 01:10:38,096 --> 01:10:40,689 Just so you know 1256 01:10:41,849 --> 01:10:44,728 I don't care what they say 1257 01:10:45,019 --> 01:10:49,774 I know what you meant For me that day 1258 01:10:50,148 --> 01:10:54,778 I just want another try 1259 01:10:55,153 --> 01:10:59,944 I just want another night 1260 01:11:01,409 --> 01:11:07,121 Even if it doesn't seem quite right 1261 01:11:07,583 --> 01:11:11,417 You meant, for me, much more 1262 01:11:11,753 --> 01:11:15,905 Than anyone I've met before 1263 01:11:16,258 --> 01:11:22,334 One single night with you, little Jesse 1264 01:11:22,765 --> 01:11:27,679 Is worth a thousand with anybody 1265 01:11:28,937 --> 01:11:32,169 I have no bitterness, my sweet 1266 01:11:32,650 --> 01:11:37,517 I'll never forget this one-night thing 1267 01:11:37,904 --> 01:11:43,775 Even tomorrow, in other arms 1268 01:11:44,203 --> 01:11:49,993 My heart will stay yours until I die 1269 01:11:54,421 --> 01:11:59,017 Let me sing you a waltz 1270 01:11:59,384 --> 01:12:04,220 Out of nowhere, out of my blues 1271 01:12:04,599 --> 01:12:09,353 Let me sing you a waltz 1272 01:12:09,728 --> 01:12:14,723 About this lovely one-night stand 1273 01:12:32,041 --> 01:12:35,511 - No, one more ! Please, please. - No ! It was our deal. 1274 01:12:35,878 --> 01:12:38,234 One... One song. No, no, no. 1275 01:12:38,549 --> 01:12:40,983 You can have your tea and then... 1276 01:12:46,515 --> 01:12:48,791 - All right, let me ask you one question. - What? 1277 01:12:49,060 --> 01:12:52,211 Do you just plug that name in for every guy that comes up here? 1278 01:12:52,939 --> 01:12:54,212 Yes, of course. 1279 01:12:54,439 --> 01:12:58,352 What do you think, that I wrote the song about you? Are you nuts? 1280 01:13:02,907 --> 01:13:05,180 Is this you? Little cross-eyed Celine? 1281 01:13:05,449 --> 01:13:07,917 - Yes. That's funny. - Cute. 1282 01:13:09,412 --> 01:13:12,689 - Is that your grandmother? - Yeah. 1283 01:13:14,585 --> 01:13:16,575 Oh, wow. 1284 01:13:17,044 --> 01:13:20,002 - You want some honey? - Yeah, sure. 1285 01:14:09,807 --> 01:14:12,037 Did you ever see Nina Simone in concert? 1286 01:14:12,309 --> 01:14:14,743 No, I never did. I can't believe she's gone. 1287 01:14:15,187 --> 01:14:16,620 I know, it's so sad. 1288 01:14:17,816 --> 01:14:19,215 Thanks. 1289 01:14:19,442 --> 01:14:21,353 It's hot. 1290 01:14:23,529 --> 01:14:26,248 I saw her twice in concert. 1291 01:14:26,990 --> 01:14:29,186 She was so great. 1292 01:14:29,494 --> 01:14:32,372 That's one of my favorite songs of hers. 1293 01:14:48,344 --> 01:14:49,618 She was so great. 1294 01:14:51,598 --> 01:14:53,793 She was so funny in concert too. 1295 01:14:54,059 --> 01:14:58,052 She would... She would be right in the middle of a song and then... 1296 01:14:58,397 --> 01:15:00,194 ... you know, stop... 1297 01:15:00,440 --> 01:15:04,354 ... and walk from the piano all the way to the edge of the stage. 1298 01:15:04,696 --> 01:15:06,926 Like, really slowly. 1299 01:15:09,992 --> 01:15:13,144 And she'd start talking to someone in the audience. 1300 01:15:13,455 --> 01:15:16,686 "Oh, yeah, baby. Oh, yeah. 1301 01:15:17,584 --> 01:15:19,732 I love you too. " 1302 01:15:20,251 --> 01:15:24,530 And then she'd walk back. Take her time, no hurry, you know. 1303 01:15:24,882 --> 01:15:28,238 She had that big, cute ass. 1304 01:15:28,552 --> 01:15:30,030 She would move. 1305 01:15:31,804 --> 01:15:36,435 And then she would go back to the piano and play some more, you know. 1306 01:15:38,145 --> 01:15:39,737 And then she would, I don't know... 1307 01:15:39,980 --> 01:15:42,369 ... just start another song in the middle of another. 1308 01:15:42,649 --> 01:15:46,278 You know, like, stop again, and be like: 1309 01:15:46,612 --> 01:15:50,447 "You over there, can you move that fan. 1310 01:15:51,534 --> 01:15:53,569 You're cute. 1311 01:16:14,680 --> 01:16:16,591 Oh, yeah. " 1312 01:16:20,229 --> 01:16:24,347 Baby, you are gonna miss that plane. 1313 01:16:25,818 --> 01:16:27,649 I know.