1
00:00:02,101 --> 00:00:04,652
(Male narrator)
cheers is filmed before
a live studio audience.
2
00:00:04,720 --> 00:00:06,838
Hey, everybody!
3
00:00:06,906 --> 00:00:09,307
My grandmother
cleaned out her attic.
Guess what she found?
4
00:00:09,375 --> 00:00:11,759
Your grandfather?
5
00:00:11,827 --> 00:00:14,295
No. He doesn't go
in the attic.
6
00:00:16,532 --> 00:00:18,683
It's a memory quilt
that all the women
7
00:00:18,751 --> 00:00:21,686
In my family made for me
when i graduated from
high school.
8
00:00:21,753 --> 00:00:23,270
Yeah, i've heard about
these things.
9
00:00:23,338 --> 00:00:24,806
Lots of women get together
10
00:00:24,874 --> 00:00:26,541
And embroider patches
that illustrate
the happy memories
11
00:00:26,609 --> 00:00:28,326
Of a young man's life.
12
00:00:28,394 --> 00:00:30,745
So these women were, what,
authentic folk artists
then, huh?
13
00:00:30,812 --> 00:00:32,514
No, just bored housewives.
14
00:00:33,599 --> 00:00:35,282
Hey, check this out.
15
00:00:35,350 --> 00:00:37,618
See this soft little
square here?
Yeah.
16
00:00:37,686 --> 00:00:40,538
This is a piece of
my very first baby blanket.
17
00:00:40,606 --> 00:00:43,274
Now, uh, what do those
little dots signify?
18
00:00:43,342 --> 00:00:46,845
Well, that represents
my very first childhood
disease, smallpox.
19
00:00:47,980 --> 00:00:49,447
I almost died.
20
00:00:51,650 --> 00:00:53,735
Well, what's that, uh,
long green thing there?
21
00:00:53,802 --> 00:00:57,338
Oh, uh, this is
the beanstalk from
my first high school play.
22
00:00:57,406 --> 00:00:58,957
I fell off of it
in the first act,
23
00:00:59,024 --> 00:01:01,409
Cracked 2 ribs
and punctured a lung.
24
00:01:02,195 --> 00:01:03,612
I almost died.
25
00:01:06,466 --> 00:01:08,983
Oh, this red patch here
represents the big fire
26
00:01:09,051 --> 00:01:11,302
That burned down my house
when i was 6.
27
00:01:12,121 --> 00:01:14,205
And what, you almost died?
28
00:01:14,824 --> 00:01:17,225
No, i got out.
29
00:01:17,292 --> 00:01:19,527
But while i was running away,
i fell in this well,
30
00:01:19,595 --> 00:01:21,963
Right here and i almost...
31
00:01:22,898 --> 00:01:24,549
well, you know.
32
00:01:30,406 --> 00:01:32,707
¶ making your way
in the world today ¶
33
00:01:32,808 --> 00:01:35,960
¶ takes everything
you've got ¶
34
00:01:36,028 --> 00:01:38,630
¶ taking a break
from all your worries ¶
35
00:01:38,698 --> 00:01:40,765
¶ sure would help a lot
36
00:01:42,167 --> 00:01:45,102
¶ wouldn't you like
to get away ¶
37
00:01:47,806 --> 00:01:49,925
¶ sometimes you want to go
38
00:01:49,992 --> 00:01:53,228
¶ where everybody
knows your name ¶
39
00:01:55,497 --> 00:01:58,366
¶ and they're always
glad you came ¶
40
00:02:00,036 --> 00:02:02,387
¶ you wanna be
where you can see ¶
41
00:02:02,455 --> 00:02:05,106
¶ our troubles
are all the same ¶
42
00:02:05,174 --> 00:02:08,876
¶ you wanna be
where everybody
knows your name ¶
43
00:02:10,413 --> 00:02:12,948
¶ you wanna go
where people know ¶
44
00:02:13,015 --> 00:02:15,483
¶ people are all the same
45
00:02:15,551 --> 00:02:19,487
¶ you wanna go
where everybody
knows your name ¶
46
00:02:20,000 --> 00:02:27,000
*نسخه سافت ساب شده توسط موویوبات*
موویوبات کامل ترین و پیشرفته ترین رسانه دانلود فیلم و سریال
movieobot.com
47
00:02:38,724 --> 00:02:41,009
Ok, everybody, i got
a petition here
48
00:02:41,077 --> 00:02:42,460
I want you all to sign.
49
00:02:42,528 --> 00:02:44,412
Clavin, you first.
50
00:02:44,480 --> 00:02:46,614
Huh? No, no, carla,
i'm very particular
51
00:02:46,681 --> 00:02:48,782
About where i put
my john hancock.
52
00:02:48,850 --> 00:02:50,918
If you don't sign this
in the next 30 seconds,
53
00:02:50,986 --> 00:02:53,787
Your john hancock
is gonna be a betsy ross.
54
00:02:56,091 --> 00:02:58,727
Right about here, you say?
55
00:02:58,794 --> 00:03:01,563
Uh, not that i'm questioning
you, or anything sweetheart,
56
00:03:01,630 --> 00:03:02,981
But what are we
signing here?
57
00:03:03,048 --> 00:03:05,149
Well, you now,
when eddie passed away, uh,
58
00:03:05,217 --> 00:03:07,351
I wanted to do something
special for him so
59
00:03:07,419 --> 00:03:10,321
I started this petition
to get the bruins
to retire his number,
60
00:03:10,389 --> 00:03:12,257
Kind of like a memorial.
61
00:03:12,325 --> 00:03:14,843
Yeah, that will show him
that people of boston
won't forget old--
62
00:03:14,910 --> 00:03:17,879
Old-- What the hell's
his number?
63
00:03:17,947 --> 00:03:20,014
38.
38. Oh, no, no.
64
00:03:20,082 --> 00:03:22,150
No, no, 38 will not work.
65
00:03:22,218 --> 00:03:24,785
That's like the most popular
guy on the team, one of
the top scorers.
66
00:03:24,854 --> 00:03:26,620
Is he dead?
67
00:03:26,688 --> 00:03:28,723
All right, eddie's got him
there, i guess.
68
00:03:28,790 --> 00:03:30,124
Don't you forget it.
69
00:03:30,192 --> 00:03:32,961
All right i got to get
more names, everybody!
70
00:03:33,028 --> 00:03:35,413
You guys over here,
you want to sign a petition
71
00:03:35,481 --> 00:03:36,915
To commemorate eddie lebec?
72
00:03:36,982 --> 00:03:38,215
Oh, sure.
73
00:03:38,283 --> 00:03:40,685
Well deserved,
too.
Thank you.
74
00:03:40,753 --> 00:03:42,954
At least somebody around here
has some respect.
75
00:03:43,021 --> 00:03:45,657
Who's eddie lebec?
You remember.
76
00:03:45,724 --> 00:03:47,692
He's that cartoon skunk.
77
00:03:49,478 --> 00:03:52,664
Who always--Always
fell in love
with black cats
78
00:03:52,731 --> 00:03:55,166
That had crawled under
freshly painted fences.
79
00:03:55,233 --> 00:03:56,468
Oh, yeah.
80
00:03:56,535 --> 00:03:57,969
Is he dead?
81
00:03:58,838 --> 00:04:00,438
Yeah, just sign.
82
00:04:04,460 --> 00:04:06,011
[Mumbling]
83
00:04:06,846 --> 00:04:08,013
Why...
84
00:04:09,248 --> 00:04:11,266
why me?
85
00:04:11,333 --> 00:04:14,285
You want to talk about it,
or do you want to whine?
86
00:04:14,353 --> 00:04:16,621
I guess i want to
talk about it.
87
00:04:16,689 --> 00:04:19,591
No, no. We can't do both.
88
00:04:19,658 --> 00:04:23,060
Corporate wants me to
throw some idiotic, stupid
retirement party
89
00:04:23,128 --> 00:04:25,897
For some insignificant
middle-Management nobody.
90
00:04:25,948 --> 00:04:28,749
You're retiring?
Congratulations!
91
00:04:28,817 --> 00:04:32,554
I wish. You know,
i thought i was through
with this sort of crap.
92
00:04:32,621 --> 00:04:34,505
Corporate hasn't
bothered me for months now.
93
00:04:34,573 --> 00:04:38,743
In fact, i haven't even
heard from those people
in i don't know how long.
94
00:04:39,211 --> 00:04:40,578
Hey.
95
00:04:41,213 --> 00:04:42,780
Wait a minute.
96
00:04:42,848 --> 00:04:45,950
You don't think
they have somebody else
doing this stuff, do you?
97
00:04:46,017 --> 00:04:50,120
[Gasps]
who's moving in on my turf?
98
00:04:50,188 --> 00:04:52,239
I'm gonna make
a few calls.
99
00:04:54,076 --> 00:04:55,593
Hello, everyone.
100
00:04:55,661 --> 00:04:57,662
It's cranes a trois.
101
00:04:59,031 --> 00:05:01,166
Look who's making
his first trip to the big bar.
102
00:05:01,233 --> 00:05:03,634
Ooh, show everybody
his little fake i.D., Hon.
103
00:05:05,171 --> 00:05:06,370
Frasier, please.
104
00:05:06,438 --> 00:05:08,439
Oh, i'm just having
a little fun.
105
00:05:08,491 --> 00:05:10,892
You know, i've tapped
into a whole new vein of
humor with this baby thing.
106
00:05:10,959 --> 00:05:14,512
For example, how many babies
does it take to change
a light bulb?
107
00:05:14,579 --> 00:05:16,563
Answer: none!
108
00:05:16,631 --> 00:05:20,134
Babies don't have the motor
skills or the depth perception
to change a light bulb.
109
00:05:21,537 --> 00:05:23,137
That one does get me.
110
00:05:25,807 --> 00:05:28,426
He looks so different
than he did in the hospital.
111
00:05:28,493 --> 00:05:31,178
Yes, i know. You know
the days flee so quickly.
112
00:05:31,246 --> 00:05:34,248
If only we had had
the foresight to capture those
early days of innocence,
113
00:05:34,316 --> 00:05:36,750
But now, they're gone forever.
114
00:05:36,818 --> 00:05:38,886
How old is he now?
About a week.
115
00:05:40,723 --> 00:05:43,190
Say, did his bellybutton
fall off yet?
116
00:05:44,009 --> 00:05:45,777
Any day now.
117
00:05:46,195 --> 00:05:47,812
What, what do you mean?
118
00:05:47,879 --> 00:05:49,480
Well, you see,
when the umbilical cord
is severed,
119
00:05:49,548 --> 00:05:52,901
The remaining umbilicus
stays attached to the naval
for several days,
120
00:05:53,002 --> 00:05:54,886
During which time
it, uh, comes to resemble
121
00:05:54,953 --> 00:05:58,322
A sort of shriveled,
week-Old banana.
122
00:05:58,374 --> 00:06:01,675
Hey, you know, it's very funny
you use that analogy
because the, uh,
123
00:06:01,743 --> 00:06:05,913
Human umbilical cord
if memory serves
is 90% potassium.
124
00:06:10,819 --> 00:06:13,254
Stay away from the baby,
will you, cliff?
125
00:06:22,498 --> 00:06:23,848
You got a name
for him yet?
126
00:06:23,916 --> 00:06:26,567
Frederick.
Hey, all right!
127
00:06:26,635 --> 00:06:28,953
Fred freddy,
the fredder man!
128
00:06:30,021 --> 00:06:31,422
Frederick.
129
00:06:33,558 --> 00:06:36,277
That, uh,
that's quite a rig
you got there.
130
00:06:36,344 --> 00:06:38,263
Isn't it marvelous?
131
00:06:38,265 --> 00:06:40,632
This is a native rebozo
used by the peasant women
of mexico
132
00:06:40,699 --> 00:06:44,936
To keep the baby close
and warm and enable it to feel
the mother's heartbeat.
133
00:06:45,137 --> 00:06:47,021
How much does something
like that run you?
134
00:06:47,088 --> 00:06:49,523
Oh, just a few paltry
pesos in mexico.
135
00:06:49,591 --> 00:06:52,459
Or $144 at saks.
136
00:06:54,229 --> 00:06:56,363
Well, daddy, we should run
if we want to pick up
137
00:06:56,432 --> 00:06:58,449
Those deli platters
before the party.
Right.
138
00:06:58,517 --> 00:07:00,835
You are all coming
to the bris
this afternoon, aren't you?
139
00:07:00,902 --> 00:07:03,471
Oh, you bet, we wouldn't
miss that bris deal
for anything.
140
00:07:03,538 --> 00:07:05,473
You know, i can't tell you
how much it means to us.
141
00:07:05,541 --> 00:07:08,209
As you all know, i was raised
without a religious tradition,
142
00:07:08,277 --> 00:07:11,095
And i'm determined my son
shall not be
similarly deprived.
143
00:07:11,163 --> 00:07:12,964
I'm so grateful to lilith
and her jewish faith
144
00:07:13,032 --> 00:07:16,701
For providing frederick
a heritage of spirituality.
145
00:07:16,769 --> 00:07:19,436
You know,
and the ceremony promises
to be quite enlightening, too.
146
00:07:19,504 --> 00:07:22,339
I mean, after all
it's not everyday
you're ritually circumcised.
147
00:07:22,407 --> 00:07:23,774
What?
148
00:07:23,926 --> 00:07:25,692
Well, that's what
a bris is.
149
00:07:25,760 --> 00:07:28,896
Yes. It's the religious
ceremony where the--The
baby is circumcised.
150
00:07:28,964 --> 00:07:30,464
Oh, the baby!
151
00:07:42,143 --> 00:07:46,314
Look, eddie wasn't just
any hockey player.
He was a legend.
152
00:07:46,381 --> 00:07:48,733
He represents
the little people.
153
00:07:48,800 --> 00:07:50,801
It's the least you can do!
154
00:07:51,469 --> 00:07:53,203
Ok, fine!
155
00:07:53,271 --> 00:07:56,307
Boy, one of these days
i'm gonna kill my mother.
156
00:07:58,344 --> 00:08:00,728
Hey, are those losers
from corporate here yet?
157
00:08:00,795 --> 00:08:01,995
Just you.
158
00:08:03,916 --> 00:08:05,232
What is that?
159
00:08:05,300 --> 00:08:08,035
Oh, i needed some
refreshments for
the retirement party, so,
160
00:08:08,103 --> 00:08:10,821
I got this day-Old platter
of seafood from melville's.
161
00:08:10,889 --> 00:08:14,425
Oh, the shrimp
is slithering off
the toothpicks.
162
00:08:14,492 --> 00:08:17,211
[Groans]
well, don't just stand there.
Get me a hot glue gun.
163
00:08:19,898 --> 00:08:23,117
Sam, what are you doing
back? I thought you were going
to the baby's bris.
164
00:08:23,184 --> 00:08:24,852
Well, i wanted to.
165
00:08:24,920 --> 00:08:28,989
You ever try to find a date
for one of those things?
166
00:08:29,057 --> 00:08:32,543
Don't you think that frasier
and lilith are gonna be
insulted if you're not there?
167
00:08:32,610 --> 00:08:36,196
Oh, you know what a mob scene
those circumcisions are.
168
00:08:37,649 --> 00:08:40,685
They're not gonna miss
one little person.
169
00:08:40,752 --> 00:08:44,421
Hey, wait a minute, man.
What are you doing here?
170
00:08:44,489 --> 00:08:46,057
I was gonna go,
171
00:08:46,124 --> 00:08:48,826
But i didn't-- You know,
the thought of renting
a tuxedo and everything...
172
00:08:48,894 --> 00:08:52,263
It wasn't formal. You didn't
need to rent a tuxedo.
No?
173
00:08:52,331 --> 00:08:54,932
Great, then i can afford
a few more rounds.
174
00:08:55,000 --> 00:08:58,285
You know, you guys,
this is a very
important occasion
175
00:08:58,354 --> 00:09:00,388
For the cranes.
Somebody should go there
from cheers.
176
00:09:00,456 --> 00:09:01,689
Why aren't you there?
177
00:09:01,757 --> 00:09:03,290
I have a perfect excuse.
178
00:09:03,359 --> 00:09:05,476
I have to entertain
a bunch of deadheads.
179
00:09:05,544 --> 00:09:08,579
Well, we're here.
Start, uh, juggling.
180
00:09:12,167 --> 00:09:15,302
Uh, we're here for
my retirement party.
181
00:09:15,304 --> 00:09:18,105
Oh, yes, yes, yes,
everything's set up
in the back.
182
00:09:18,207 --> 00:09:19,958
Come on.
183
00:09:20,025 --> 00:09:22,209
Come on.
Shake 'em, don't dawdle.
184
00:09:23,829 --> 00:09:26,530
I don't see why
i have to retire, i'm only 65.
185
00:09:26,598 --> 00:09:29,067
I've got 10 or 15 more
good years in me.
186
00:09:29,134 --> 00:09:31,569
The seafood will
take care of that.
187
00:09:35,858 --> 00:09:38,092
Hey. Sam and mr. Peterson
are here.
188
00:09:38,159 --> 00:09:40,478
[Exclaims]
you didn't go either?
189
00:09:40,546 --> 00:09:42,713
Well, it's not our fault.
I mean...
190
00:09:42,781 --> 00:09:46,918
we looked and looked
for a place to park.
Just couldn't find one.
191
00:09:46,985 --> 00:09:48,636
Maybe we should have
looked near their house
192
00:09:48,704 --> 00:09:51,439
Instead of just around
the ball park.
193
00:09:51,506 --> 00:09:53,124
So you guys all
chickened out, huh?
194
00:09:53,192 --> 00:09:55,626
Carla, you're a woman.
You couldn't
possibly understand.
195
00:09:55,694 --> 00:09:58,395
What, you're a bunch of
wussy wimps
196
00:09:58,463 --> 00:10:00,531
Who couldn't even
go to a religious ceremony
197
00:10:00,598 --> 00:10:03,100
That involved a little pain
that wasn't even your own?
198
00:10:03,168 --> 00:10:05,169
Oh, then you
do understand.
199
00:10:06,437 --> 00:10:08,306
Uh, yeah,
this is nothing anyway.
200
00:10:08,373 --> 00:10:10,441
The original rites
of passage, uh, started
201
00:10:10,508 --> 00:10:12,960
With the jungle tribes
down in borneo.
202
00:10:13,028 --> 00:10:15,246
Yeah?
When young jungle
tribal lad
203
00:10:15,313 --> 00:10:18,449
Was, uh, on the brink
of puberty, they'd bring him
forward and, uh,
204
00:10:18,517 --> 00:10:21,419
Take out this large,
sharpened clamshell--
205
00:10:21,486 --> 00:10:22,970
Oh, no, no. Don't tell me.
206
00:10:23,037 --> 00:10:26,307
They would, uh, fill it
with dip, pass it around
with the hors d'oeuvres.
207
00:10:26,374 --> 00:10:29,744
Oh.
Then they'd take
these 2 big jagged rocks...
208
00:10:29,945 --> 00:10:31,645
no, cliff, cliff,
cliff, cliff.
209
00:10:31,713 --> 00:10:33,931
...bang them together
to call the tribes
out of the hills.
210
00:10:33,998 --> 00:10:36,434
You know, then the, uh,
witchdoctor stepped up
211
00:10:36,501 --> 00:10:39,870
With this long,
sharpened bamboo staff...
212
00:10:39,938 --> 00:10:41,305
oh, here it comes.
213
00:10:41,372 --> 00:10:43,574
...shoved it into the ground
and hung a flag on it.
214
00:10:43,641 --> 00:10:47,361
Then they danced around it
pretty much till
they dropped really.
215
00:10:47,428 --> 00:10:50,598
Wait. W-W-When do they
circumcise the kid?
216
00:10:50,600 --> 00:10:52,116
What do you mean,
circumcise?
217
00:10:52,184 --> 00:10:54,885
There are no jews
in borneo, you mulyak.
218
00:11:05,830 --> 00:11:08,599
I don't know
about you guys...
219
00:11:08,684 --> 00:11:11,835
i feel ashamed.
I mean, lilith and frasier
are our friends, you know?
220
00:11:11,903 --> 00:11:13,420
We should be there.
221
00:11:13,488 --> 00:11:14,788
Sammy's right.
222
00:11:14,856 --> 00:11:17,291
There are times
when a man has to stand up
and be counted.
223
00:11:17,359 --> 00:11:20,561
Now, they will have
those really big pickles,
won't they?
224
00:11:20,629 --> 00:11:22,380
Yeah, you're right.
I'm with you, sammy.
225
00:11:22,447 --> 00:11:24,415
Besides, you know,
frasier's our pal.
226
00:11:24,482 --> 00:11:26,784
You know, if he's man
enough to do this,
then we should be.
227
00:11:26,851 --> 00:11:28,135
There you go.
Come on.
228
00:11:30,288 --> 00:11:32,856
The bris is off.
I've kidnapped my son.
229
00:11:43,452 --> 00:11:45,920
You kidnapped him?
What about the bris?
230
00:11:45,987 --> 00:11:48,539
Sam, i just couldn't
go through with it.
231
00:11:48,607 --> 00:11:52,076
I mean, i-- You know,
i tried to. Tradition
and lilith and all that,
232
00:11:52,143 --> 00:11:54,812
But, my god, i'm the--
I'm the boy's father.
And that guy was
233
00:11:54,879 --> 00:11:57,281
About to give my son
one hell of a boo-Boo.
234
00:12:01,253 --> 00:12:03,304
I assure you, frederick,
235
00:12:03,371 --> 00:12:07,457
This won't happen
every time we have
people over to the house.
236
00:12:07,525 --> 00:12:09,026
What, uh,
237
00:12:09,094 --> 00:12:11,629
So what did the little woman
have to say about all this?
238
00:12:11,696 --> 00:12:13,613
Oh, my god, lilith.
239
00:12:13,681 --> 00:12:17,318
You know, i never looked back
after i elbowed her into
the chopped liver.
240
00:12:17,385 --> 00:12:20,654
Frasier, as a married man,
i think i can give you
some advice.
241
00:12:20,722 --> 00:12:23,674
You go back, you talk to her,
you iron this out.
242
00:12:23,741 --> 00:12:27,311
What's the worst
that could happen?
I mean, she can't kill you.
243
00:12:27,379 --> 00:12:30,464
You were dead
the moment you said,
"i do."
244
00:12:30,532 --> 00:12:32,216
You're right.
I should go back.
245
00:12:32,284 --> 00:12:34,067
But i'd be so embarrassed.
246
00:12:34,135 --> 00:12:35,769
I mean, how can you go back
to a roomful of people
247
00:12:35,837 --> 00:12:38,956
That think you're
a total idiot? I mean,
how do you do it, cliff?
248
00:12:41,276 --> 00:12:43,911
Well, i don't really
like to divulge...
249
00:12:45,113 --> 00:12:46,180
hey!
250
00:12:48,083 --> 00:12:50,584
Come here, come here,
listen, listen,
i know what you'd tell me
251
00:12:50,652 --> 00:12:53,270
In a situation like this.
First you'd say
lots of gobbledygook
252
00:12:53,338 --> 00:12:55,272
That no one could understand
but then you'd
253
00:12:55,340 --> 00:12:57,658
Get me to go back there
and face the music.
254
00:12:57,725 --> 00:12:59,410
Admit the truth.
255
00:12:59,478 --> 00:13:01,145
Well, you're right, sam.
256
00:13:01,213 --> 00:13:03,814
Confronting one's fears
is 1 of 5 ways
to resolve an inner conflict.
257
00:13:03,881 --> 00:13:07,435
Of course
the other 4 being--
God, aren't i pompous ass?
258
00:13:07,519 --> 00:13:09,486
No, you're not pompous.
259
00:13:09,554 --> 00:13:12,423
Listen,
i'll tell you what,
260
00:13:12,491 --> 00:13:14,191
We're all gonna go back
there with you.
261
00:13:14,326 --> 00:13:15,376
All right.
Really?
262
00:13:15,444 --> 00:13:16,510
You're gonna go with me?
263
00:13:16,578 --> 00:13:18,613
You bet.
Oh, great. You know,
264
00:13:18,680 --> 00:13:21,215
You're right, guys.
I was kind of panicked there
for a few minutes,
265
00:13:21,283 --> 00:13:25,286
But i'm ready to atone now,
and start behaving like
a rational and good parent.
266
00:13:25,354 --> 00:13:26,487
Oops.
267
00:13:26,555 --> 00:13:28,589
I guess we're gonna need you.
268
00:13:36,415 --> 00:13:37,848
Carla, how's your
petition coming?
269
00:13:37,916 --> 00:13:40,284
Well, it was
a little slow at first,
270
00:13:40,352 --> 00:13:44,038
But since i started
forging people's signatures,
it's gone a lot faster.
271
00:13:45,423 --> 00:13:47,675
That's nice. You know,
i never did sign that.
272
00:13:47,742 --> 00:13:48,909
Oh, yeah, you did.
273
00:13:48,977 --> 00:13:50,428
Really?
274
00:13:50,495 --> 00:13:53,364
I worked you in right here
between tom cruise
and mel gibson.
275
00:13:54,783 --> 00:13:56,450
Ooh, forge me again.
276
00:13:59,771 --> 00:14:01,889
How's it going, larry?
277
00:14:01,956 --> 00:14:05,743
Have you ever been roasted
by 7 people you don't know?
278
00:14:05,810 --> 00:14:08,145
All those funny,
insulting toasts.
279
00:14:08,213 --> 00:14:11,648
I came out to prepare
my hilarious rebuttal.
280
00:14:11,716 --> 00:14:13,450
So far, all i can
think of is,
281
00:14:13,518 --> 00:14:16,470
"Shut up. You're hurting
my feelings."
282
00:14:16,538 --> 00:14:18,055
[Laughing]
283
00:14:20,358 --> 00:14:22,426
I got a grange reunion
coming up.
284
00:14:22,494 --> 00:14:24,611
Can i steal that?
285
00:14:24,679 --> 00:14:27,048
Maybe i ought to
just--Just moon them all
286
00:14:27,115 --> 00:14:28,983
And be done with it.
287
00:14:29,051 --> 00:14:30,318
No, i'd better not.
288
00:14:30,385 --> 00:14:34,455
25 years of sitting
behind a desk
for that company,
289
00:14:34,522 --> 00:14:37,158
I have a pretty
sorry excuse for a butt.
290
00:14:40,145 --> 00:14:43,147
Well, you know, if you need
anything else, just holler.
291
00:14:44,582 --> 00:14:46,450
What a loser.
292
00:14:47,752 --> 00:14:50,521
He's not kidding
about that butt, either.
293
00:14:52,574 --> 00:14:54,642
Well, i feel sorry
for that guy.
294
00:14:54,710 --> 00:14:56,944
This is probably one of
the last parties
he'll ever have,
295
00:14:57,011 --> 00:14:59,964
And he doesn't look like
he's having a very good time.
296
00:15:00,031 --> 00:15:01,448
You know, maybe we should
liven it up.
297
00:15:01,516 --> 00:15:03,050
I'm great at parties.
298
00:15:03,117 --> 00:15:06,320
Back in hanover,
i invented the game
"hide bob's pants."
299
00:15:08,456 --> 00:15:11,092
Boy, everyone
loved that game.
300
00:15:11,159 --> 00:15:12,843
Well, except for bob.
301
00:15:17,482 --> 00:15:19,817
Hello, everyone.
302
00:15:19,951 --> 00:15:22,737
Hi, frasier.
You through with the bris?
303
00:15:22,804 --> 00:15:24,438
Yes, yes, yes.
304
00:15:24,505 --> 00:15:28,008
My son is happy, healthy,
and nowhere in the vicinity
of this bar.
305
00:15:28,076 --> 00:15:29,509
Ouch!
306
00:15:29,577 --> 00:15:32,045
Say, uh, just out of
curiosity, you know,
307
00:15:32,097 --> 00:15:33,814
Is anybody in the bar
happen to be lactating
308
00:15:33,882 --> 00:15:36,634
And in need of some
quick cash?
309
00:15:36,701 --> 00:15:38,819
Well, if so, just, uh, meet me
in the office.
310
00:15:38,887 --> 00:15:40,654
Ouch! Damn it, frederick,
311
00:15:40,722 --> 00:15:42,990
Give it up.
It's just not gonna happen.
312
00:15:45,943 --> 00:15:47,844
You know what?
313
00:15:47,912 --> 00:15:50,747
I think he's got the baby
under that coat.
314
00:15:53,651 --> 00:15:56,970
How did you know that,
woody?
315
00:15:57,038 --> 00:16:00,157
Oh, it's the same
basic premise as
"hide bob's pants."
316
00:16:07,132 --> 00:16:09,450
Oh, my god,
it's mr. Sheridan.
317
00:16:09,518 --> 00:16:11,518
What is he doing here?
318
00:16:11,586 --> 00:16:12,986
Who's he,
another deadhead?
319
00:16:13,054 --> 00:16:14,888
No. He's the executive
vice president
320
00:16:14,956 --> 00:16:18,259
In charge of east coast
marketing, research,
and sales.
321
00:16:18,326 --> 00:16:19,793
He's the what?
322
00:16:19,861 --> 00:16:21,712
He's the head deadhead.
323
00:16:24,383 --> 00:16:26,350
Mr. Sheridan,
what a surprise!
324
00:16:26,418 --> 00:16:28,018
Miss howe,
you're looking very well.
325
00:16:28,086 --> 00:16:30,203
Thank you and to what do i
owe this honor?
326
00:16:30,271 --> 00:16:32,389
Well, i'm here
for larry's party.
327
00:16:32,457 --> 00:16:34,257
You know larry?
328
00:16:34,259 --> 00:16:37,694
Oh, yes, he's
a dear old friend
and my wife's younger brother.
329
00:16:37,762 --> 00:16:39,429
Is your wife coming?
330
00:16:39,431 --> 00:16:41,865
No. I'm afraid
she's passed away.
331
00:16:41,933 --> 00:16:43,233
Oh, then you're stag?
332
00:16:46,204 --> 00:16:49,823
Uh, i--I didn't expect to
see you at this party, sir.
333
00:16:49,890 --> 00:16:52,742
Oh, i remember what
wonderful shindigs
you throw.
334
00:16:52,810 --> 00:16:56,547
As a matter of fact,
i recommended you
for larry's farewell.
335
00:16:56,614 --> 00:16:59,650
I can't wait to see
what fun and excitement
you've planned.
336
00:16:59,717 --> 00:17:02,519
You know, actually, uh,
the real surprises
haven't come yet.
337
00:17:02,587 --> 00:17:04,104
Oh, good, then i haven't
missed anything.
338
00:17:04,222 --> 00:17:05,989
That's safe to say.
339
00:17:07,025 --> 00:17:08,909
Now those pants
i could hide.
340
00:17:11,196 --> 00:17:14,148
Now i have to plan something
exciting for these people!
341
00:17:14,883 --> 00:17:16,067
Frasier?
342
00:17:16,134 --> 00:17:17,734
Frasier?
Wh-Where is he?
343
00:17:17,802 --> 00:17:19,470
Where's my husband?
Where's my baby?
344
00:17:19,538 --> 00:17:21,205
Where's my beer?
345
00:17:22,290 --> 00:17:23,857
They're in the office.
346
00:17:23,924 --> 00:17:25,459
Dr. Levinson, friends,
347
00:17:25,527 --> 00:17:27,194
Please, just have a seat.
348
00:17:27,261 --> 00:17:30,063
I'll just be a minute
while i reason with him.
349
00:17:30,131 --> 00:17:33,834
Wife to husband.
Scientist to scientist.
350
00:17:33,902 --> 00:17:36,837
Frasier, have you gone
completely meshugana?
351
00:17:39,207 --> 00:17:41,091
Sam, this is terrible.
352
00:17:41,158 --> 00:17:42,659
What?
353
00:17:42,727 --> 00:17:45,445
Mr. Sheridan,
the vice president is here and
he expects a terrific party.
354
00:17:45,514 --> 00:17:48,382
Now i've got to think
of something,
think of something fantastic.
355
00:17:48,449 --> 00:17:49,683
What do you think?
356
00:17:49,751 --> 00:17:51,886
It's your party.
Y-You think of something.
357
00:17:51,953 --> 00:17:53,521
Yeah, right.
What do you want me to do?
358
00:17:53,588 --> 00:17:56,857
Go back there, strip naked,
and gyrate to
funky cold medina?
359
00:17:58,994 --> 00:18:02,128
We could help you rehearse
if you want.
360
00:18:02,196 --> 00:18:04,297
I'm being nuts. I gotta think
of something classy.
361
00:18:04,299 --> 00:18:08,035
Yeah, i'll tell you what
the sox did at our reunion
we had once.
362
00:18:08,102 --> 00:18:09,787
Didn't hurt a bit.
What was that?
363
00:18:09,854 --> 00:18:12,089
Wet t-Shirt contest.
Excuse me?
364
00:18:12,240 --> 00:18:16,210
All right, it wasn't
a contest, it was fixed,
but we still had a lot of fun.
365
00:18:16,278 --> 00:18:18,795
You know, you don't
just rustle up
a wet t-Shirt contest
366
00:18:18,863 --> 00:18:20,330
At the drop of a hat.
367
00:18:20,398 --> 00:18:22,549
Sure you do. It's just like
ordering a pizza.
368
00:18:22,617 --> 00:18:25,118
As a matter of fact,
i think i have
the 800 number here.
369
00:18:25,187 --> 00:18:27,488
Here you go.
370
00:18:27,556 --> 00:18:30,624
"Fulfilling your
wet t-Shirt needs
since 1988."
371
00:18:32,327 --> 00:18:34,295
No, sam, i'm not gonna
let you call
372
00:18:34,362 --> 00:18:35,862
And arrange
a wet t-Shirt contest.
373
00:18:35,930 --> 00:18:37,298
It exploits women.
374
00:18:37,365 --> 00:18:38,999
What, you got a better idea?
375
00:18:39,067 --> 00:18:41,035
I'll call.
376
00:18:41,102 --> 00:18:42,836
What about
exploiting women?
377
00:18:42,904 --> 00:18:45,172
Well, you know,
when a man does it,
it's exploitation.
378
00:18:45,240 --> 00:18:47,741
When a woman does it,
it's good business.
379
00:18:47,792 --> 00:18:48,775
Hi!
380
00:18:48,843 --> 00:18:50,977
Is this jiggly party queens?
381
00:18:58,753 --> 00:19:02,155
Well, frasier,
you've been in there quite
a while. How's it going?
382
00:19:02,223 --> 00:19:03,924
Well, it shouldn't be
much longer.
383
00:19:03,992 --> 00:19:06,177
It's almost
my turn to talk.
384
00:19:08,630 --> 00:19:10,197
So how do you think
the party's going?
385
00:19:10,264 --> 00:19:11,881
It's terrific.
386
00:19:11,949 --> 00:19:14,501
You know, if those kittens
with their cropped tops
and seltzer bottles
387
00:19:14,568 --> 00:19:16,603
Can't liven things up,
then darn it,
388
00:19:16,670 --> 00:19:20,574
Men aren't just as depraved
as i thought they were.
389
00:19:20,642 --> 00:19:22,892
How's it going? Are the girls
cheering him up?
390
00:19:22,960 --> 00:19:25,712
Well, no. Actually, the girls
are depressed now, too.
391
00:19:27,782 --> 00:19:29,867
Boy, i'll tell you,
nothing can bring down
a party faster
392
00:19:29,934 --> 00:19:33,003
Than a wet girl
telling sad stories.
393
00:19:33,071 --> 00:19:36,039
Great. My career is over.
394
00:19:36,106 --> 00:19:39,443
Yeah, i wanted to
put my arm around her
and comfort her,
395
00:19:39,511 --> 00:19:42,179
But she told me
it would me cost $10.
396
00:19:42,246 --> 00:19:44,215
It made me ashamed
to be a man.
397
00:19:44,282 --> 00:19:46,383
Anybody, uh, got change
for a $50?
398
00:19:48,202 --> 00:19:50,804
All right, let's get this
bris show on the road.
Chop, chop.
399
00:19:50,871 --> 00:19:54,424
Ooh, sorry.
Wrong choice of words.
400
00:19:54,492 --> 00:19:57,428
Rebecca, would you object
if we used your poolroom?
401
00:19:57,495 --> 00:19:58,595
Why not?
402
00:19:58,663 --> 00:19:59,830
The party's dead.
403
00:19:59,898 --> 00:20:01,531
My career is dead.
404
00:20:01,599 --> 00:20:04,134
I'm thinking of letting woody
hide my pants.
405
00:20:05,136 --> 00:20:07,104
Thank you.
406
00:20:07,172 --> 00:20:10,974
You can, uh, you can actually
do a bris in a bar?
407
00:20:11,042 --> 00:20:14,144
Oh, yes, i've performed
the ceremony in many places.
408
00:20:14,212 --> 00:20:16,113
Granted, a bar's
a little irregular,
409
00:20:16,181 --> 00:20:19,382
But, uh, i must say,
it's a lot cheerier than
the bernsteins' rec room.
410
00:20:20,384 --> 00:20:23,219
May i ask what, uh, changed
your mind?
411
00:20:23,287 --> 00:20:25,238
Well, frasier and i
had a long talk,
412
00:20:25,306 --> 00:20:27,974
And we both agree that
frederick would have
the same experience
413
00:20:28,042 --> 00:20:30,377
Even if the circumcision
took place in the hospital,
414
00:20:30,445 --> 00:20:32,412
The only difference being
we wouldn't have to
415
00:20:32,480 --> 00:20:34,214
Go through the trauma
of seeing it happen.
416
00:20:34,281 --> 00:20:37,050
Now we realize
that's selfish.
417
00:20:37,117 --> 00:20:38,618
It'll be much easier
on frederick
418
00:20:38,686 --> 00:20:41,321
If we're here to
comfort and support him.
419
00:20:41,389 --> 00:20:43,757
Therefore, we've decided to
go through with the ceremony.
420
00:20:43,825 --> 00:20:46,493
Don't touch my baby!
421
00:20:46,495 --> 00:20:48,879
Got that out of my system.
Now we can proceed.
422
00:20:54,502 --> 00:20:56,370
Great. I did it!
423
00:20:56,437 --> 00:20:58,571
Eddie's gonna be honored
after all.
424
00:20:58,639 --> 00:21:01,641
Oh, terrific. So the bruins
are retiring his number?
425
00:21:01,709 --> 00:21:04,077
No, no, the bruins
convinced me that
426
00:21:04,145 --> 00:21:07,381
Eddie wasn't
a good enough player
for that kind of an honor.
427
00:21:07,448 --> 00:21:10,283
But they offered me
season tickets
428
00:21:10,351 --> 00:21:15,155
If i leave them alone,
which was pretty much what i
was after in the first place.
429
00:21:15,223 --> 00:21:16,689
Yeah, wait till
i tell the kids.
430
00:21:16,757 --> 00:21:18,758
Maybe now
they'll respect him.
431
00:21:21,295 --> 00:21:24,330
Miss howe,
may i see you, please?
432
00:21:24,399 --> 00:21:25,465
Yes.
433
00:21:27,201 --> 00:21:29,335
Miss howe,
434
00:21:29,404 --> 00:21:31,438
That was the strangest
get-Together
435
00:21:31,506 --> 00:21:33,306
I've ever attended.
436
00:21:34,108 --> 00:21:36,376
I am so sorry, sir.
437
00:21:36,444 --> 00:21:39,012
Ordinarily,
i'd be very upset, but it--
438
00:21:39,079 --> 00:21:41,948
It all seems to have
worked out fairly well.
439
00:21:42,016 --> 00:21:43,617
It did?
Yes.
440
00:21:43,684 --> 00:21:45,385
My brother-In-Law, larry,
441
00:21:45,453 --> 00:21:47,404
Is finally
going to leave my house.
442
00:21:47,472 --> 00:21:49,973
I'm going to have
a hot pink wedding.
443
00:21:50,041 --> 00:21:53,593
Boy, it'll be good not having
that sorry butt
around the house anymore.
444
00:21:55,747 --> 00:21:59,633
Norm, i'm glad
we went to the ceremony.
445
00:21:59,701 --> 00:22:02,102
Me, too, cliffie.
I'm kind of proud of myself,
you know?
446
00:22:02,169 --> 00:22:04,071
Figure if i could
eat through that,
447
00:22:04,138 --> 00:22:06,473
I could eat
through anything.
448
00:22:08,176 --> 00:22:09,710
It's ok, baby.
449
00:22:09,777 --> 00:22:11,978
[Baby whimpering]
everything will be fine.
450
00:22:12,046 --> 00:22:13,997
(Frasier)
it's ok, baby.
451
00:22:14,065 --> 00:22:16,116
Everything will be fine.
452
00:22:16,183 --> 00:22:17,618
Say, you know,
453
00:22:17,685 --> 00:22:19,986
[Whimpering]
what do you say next time
we have a girl?
454
00:22:20,000 --> 00:22:27,000
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